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Do gut feelings mean anything?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Love stories, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 February 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 1 February 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 22-25, anonymous writes:

Apparently when it comes to love, we should follow our gut instinct. I've heard that a lot. Many people say that they just 'know' when they meet Mr Right or Miss Perfect. I've always believed this too.

But now I've fallen for someone. This is the first person I've ever truly fancied and I'm very confused. I'm aware that I'm still a teenager and that this is normal. But I don't understand why I've fallen for him. He's not particularly good looking and he's not mega confident or popular. He's just an ordinary guy at my school. Yet as I've got to know him, I've come to really like him.

I can't follow my gut though. I haven't got a clue what my gut is telling me. I can't work out if he likes me back and I don't understand what it is about him that makes me like him so much. He just makes me really happy.

So do gut feelings mean anything? I think it definately counts for something. What are your thoughts/experiences? How important is following your gut feeling?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2010):

Because hes not particularly good looking, confident or popular, you are questioning why your gut tells you hes someone you could have a relatinship with. Its his personality thats attractive to you. And thats a great place to start. Just keep being friends with him and see where it leads x

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A female reader, Not My Name Australia +, writes (1 February 2010):

Not My Name agony auntI absolutley believe in gut instinct, ... this is the exact same thing some people call psychic intuition, and yes it is something we all possess to varying degree's, just some poeple have trained to learn to recognize, enhance and intentionally use it.

I feel this is an instinct inherent to our very being and goes way back to humans early evolution. Verbal communication was not 'big' then, so besides emphasis on sound, species such a homo habilus relied on this instinct to warn them of impending danger, as wella s to a basic degree communicate etween each other.

Now days it still does that, we sense a situation is not good and get out of there, we walk in to a room with a smiling couple and yet feel we could 'cut the air with a knife' (and no doubt they just had a huge row and are putting on a front),... the phone rings and we just KNOW who it is, ...but one of the area's I believe this is naturally strongest is when it comes to sensing potential love interests.

Somethign I say to my friends when they want me to kinda guage a 'feel' for them on a guy is, 'don't ask me, ask your own soul' and remind them to think back over their life time and see if they ever did suspect someone was really in to them and got it wrong. Most times , the answer is NO, ... something in us just knows. I am never wrong on this in my own interactions anyway (probably why I have often made the first move - I trust my instincts and know I wont get a knock back which takes some of the fear factor out of the equation) but likewise, my friends seem to concur when I put it to them like this.

Anywya, this is probably all a bit long winded, but you hit on one of my fav topics :-) but I will conclude on saying take a moment, push out of your mind all the little interactions, all the attempts to read cues from action, all the analysis of words said, all the visuals of looks given, ... try to go in to silence cutting out allthe chatter in your head, and then ask yourself what do you FEEL!

That is how to tap in to the gut instincts.

Good Luck with it! :-)

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A female reader, visione United States +, writes (1 February 2010):

visione agony auntSometimes its the whole package that makes you enjoy being around someone, all the small things put together. You don't have to pinpoint a certain trait just to like someone!

Yes gut feelings are important, if you pair them up with emotional and logical support, it's even more important. Gut feelings are also typically the feelings you get when you know something is wrong with your relationship, but you can't pinpoint what it is(so yes it works the other way too!).

I don't believe you can just know if you've met the 'right one' because there is a lot to know about someone and it's very hard to just KNOW it all in a short time ;) but I do agree that gut feelings will help you decide if a person will be a good match for you (friend-wise or more).

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom + , writes (1 February 2010):

Someone once said to me something that was interesting. You can't always trust your head, you can't always trust you heart, but you can always trust your gut instinct. Your gun is telling you basically that right now you are unsure of this guy. So get to know him. Talk to him, listen to him, get to know him even more. He makes you happy, and that's what counts. Then you'll know how you feel about him.

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