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male
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anonymous
writes: Since discovering a few months ago that the likelihood of me fathering a child was very slim, my wife of 5 years has lost any interest in me. I have now recently disovered a photo on her phone of another man in my bed. I don't want to lose her but have no idea what action I should take?... Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, camille +, writes (6 July 2006):
Peeple do have affairs and come through the other side and as you say you don't want to lose her, I'm assuming you're willing to forgive her? Personally And someone who's willing to do this to you, isn't really a loss, as they're not worth having. Life's touigh enough without spening it with someone who hurts you. You need to face this though rather than pretend you don't know. If she's lost interest in you since you found out this news, ask if it's because of that news, it may be a coincidence. The man maybe the reason she's lost interest. She may want a family at the risk of losing you, but it sounds like it's an affair to me. I may be jumping way ahead of myself here, but I wonder if to her, this man could be a potential sperm donor. If your wife is wanting to get pregnant, she may be using this man? It's very disrespectful to go behind your back, but especially so in your bed. If she's lost interest cos you may not be able to father her children, she's not a supportive partner. We already know she's not loyal, so maybe you should think about if you want to spend your life with someone who's cheated. Don't settle for this, you deserve better.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2006): leave do not stay get a qucik divorce my husband committed adultery with four other women I knew nothing about i want a divorce but i do not know what to do
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A
female
reader, helpful girl +, writes (6 July 2006):
im sorry to say but you have to lose her my fellers had a vesetermy and will never have kids as much as id love to have them im still by his side and love him if she loved you the same she wouldnt have a photo on her phone of another man especially not in your bed! she doesnt love you sothere for its a one way love thing where your doing all the loveing and these ralationships never work and always end in tears you need to get away and find some one who will love you for everything you are!
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A
male
reader, Yos + ♥, writes (6 July 2006):
Ask her about it. Don't accuse or attack, just ask her "I saw a photo of a man in our bed on your phone. Can you tell me about it?".
You two need to have a serious open talk with each other. Say everything that needs to be said. Only by the two of you doing this do you have a hope of understanding what she (and you) are going through, and coming to the best solution for the both of you (whatever that is).
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