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Did I over-react to his initial rejection ?

Tagged as: Marriage problems, Sex, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (15 May 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 17 May 2016)
A female India age 30-35, *inshi writes:

Hi! So my husband and I went to different cities post marriage because of work and met recently after a gap of six long months.

In order to spice things up I dressed up in a nice lingerie and surprised him. In his response he kissed me, then pushed me away and said - let me find my charger and then we'll have wine and then we will start.

I felt embarrassed and furious standing half naked there while he casually starts looking for his phone charger.

I then changed into my pyjamas. He didn't understand what was wrong and when I told him he thought I was making a big issue about it. Is it me overreacting?Else, How should I make him realise why this was wrong on his part?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2016):

Thst sounds manipulative to me. I think he wants you to really need him sexually. Maybe he's worried you found another guy.

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A female reader, aunt honesty Ireland +, writes (17 May 2016):

aunt honesty agony auntYou are a young married couple therefore I can understand why you would be worried about his behavior, and obviously straight away you are going to take this as a rejection.

However in his defense, maybe he was taken aback by it, maybe after six months he got used to being on his own and was a bit shocked. The thing is if this is the only issue then I would not see it as a big one at all. If his behavior has changed over all and the relationship is not what it used to be well then I can see why you would be worried.

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A female reader, Anonymous 123 Italy +, writes (16 May 2016):

Anonymous 123 agony auntHow are things otherwise in the relationship? Given your ages and 6 months apart, I would think he couldn't wait to get the clothes off your back. My husband couldn't even wait for me to go freshen up after a train journey when I'd met him after a gap of a few days!

Are you sure everything else is OK?

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A female reader, miss frank United Kingdom +, writes (15 May 2016):

Well now. There could be several reasons for this. Six months! That's a long time.... May be he felt nervous, anxious, was taken by surprise... You had time to plan and get excited about your plan while after six months he maybe found it too much and wanted to take things slower. How had your communication been?

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