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Can someone on meth really love anyone?

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Question - (17 June 2010) 8 Answers - (Newest, 27 July 2014)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Does a person on meth feel bad for things they have done wrong? If on meth do you black out and for get things you do or later remember and regret? If doing Meth and hurt your loved ones does the drug make you not care?

Educate me please and tell me how this drug affects the human mind. I have a friend on this crap and is going through withdrawal but seems to only care about his next high. As a drug free person I do not understand how someone on this stuff reacts or if they even have feelings. Can a person on Meth love anyone besides the drug?

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A female reader, Francis777 United States +, writes (27 July 2014):

Yes indeed. Love is love. I feel deeply in love w/ my partner before I started meth. I still love her and can even grow deeper in love. However, her intolerance of my disorganization is getting in the way. But, yes, I still love and am capable of loving her. I am planning to stop meth soon. I was able to quit it 25 years ago,..cold turkey. And never touched it again for over 20 years. But when I quit, I had to be by myself and keep lots of fluids around me and some good food. Don't expect anyone to tolerate you. Give yourself a week or so. Blessings to all. F

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2012):

i hate meth. my boyfriend who really loves me sits and crys he is sorry but does not do anything to change. I had to leave because i do not know what he does behind my back. i can not trust that drug. is he having sex with others? boys? girls? why does he lie so much if he is not?? please pray for us!! the people around the meth head. that we can escape :*(

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A male reader, beautiful doom United States +, writes (1 August 2012):

beautiful doom agony auntI believe that someone on meth can love.But whats sad about it is that eventually that person will love one thing above all else METH!Sadley im in a realationship with a meth addict.What keeps me going and hanging on is the person he once was before meth took over,and hopes that one day that man will come back to me.But everytime he takes a hit from that glass pipe not only does the devil laugh in my face but my hopes of a sober again boyfriend become a little more slim it kills me to see what he has done to himself.I really miss so many things that we use to do together simple things like watching a movie together,falling asleep at the same time,doing things with friends,all those things are long gone and all we do together now is take a trip twords the mountains so he can pick up more meth sad. But yeah i love him and ill stick by him as long as i can in hopes that one day he will open his eyes and get help.

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A female reader, JaneyB38 United States +, writes (8 September 2010):

I ponder this question myself, lately. I know he cared for me before, when he wasn't using--but lately, I think it is more about sex. Male Meth users, and some women users, use the drug mostly because they enjoy sex on it. What I've been told by my friend, a user. It's sad, cause you wonder if they even hold dear certain times together, as you do--or rather, I believe, it was just a means to get their rocks off while high. And, as others said, nothing is more important to them than meth. They become more withdrawn, less inclined to talk to you, and don't take care of themselves.

Run, while you can.

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A male reader, Boonridge McPhalify United Kingdom +, writes (17 June 2010):

Boonridge McPhalify agony auntamphetamines are addictive and have a large capacity to make the users thinking VERY illogical. i used to be hooked on speed and it was horrible, your normal feelings are replaced at first with energetic euphoria but later down the line you cant feel pleaseure, and suffer from extreme anxiety and depression. it made me blame people for my situation in ways that didnt make sense. its a drug that messes your head up more than your body and it takes ages to recover from it. the cravings are intense and dont go away for years.

as for love they may not be able to see your behaviour as for their benefit, and may resent the help being provided. of course they can still feel but the feelings they get will be distorted and tend to twist everything into believeing that others are trying to hurt them. that was my experience. i felt everyone was against me, paranoia aslo features heavily with these drugs.

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A male reader, LazyGuy Netherlands +, writes (17 June 2010):

LazyGuy agony auntNo.

To be a bit more nuanced. It depends on how you define love. Is it just a feeling of affection? Loss?

Or are you talking about the love that exists between partners? The love to take care of someone. To shelter and protect them? To be there for them?

And with this I don't just mean the desire, not the words but the action.

Simply put, if you are with a partner and you get a heartache, you would expect them to aid you right?

An addict won't. They will be to busy to get their fix. Oh they might call an ambulance, if they remembered to charge the phone and pay the bills and can remember the address. And then when you get to the hospital and are discharged, better have cab money because they will be shooting up no matter how many times they promised to be there.

Dealing with drug addicts is always knowing that a promise holds no value. That forever there addiction will overrule everything else.

They might love, but love should be more then an emotion.

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A female reader, followtheblackrabbit Cayman Islands +, writes (17 June 2010):

followtheblackrabbit agony auntTo go further, think of a starving man-he'll do anything and everything to survive and get food. On meth, the brain will be in a panic for more, it's on starvation mode for meth. The addict will not think of family or friends, meth comes first because it tricks the brain into thinking that it needs it to survive. I know of someone who sold their body for meth and attempted to sell their daughter's too, but was thankfully and miraculously stopped by undercover cop who got her proper help and saved the child. Meth has bad physical side affects too: horrible skin, and "meth mouth" which rots the teeth, gums, and mouth-serious users get this. Pray for your friend (if you're religious), hope they get better, but until they decide to help themselves, please, stay away.

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A female reader, followtheblackrabbit Cayman Islands +, writes (17 June 2010):

followtheblackrabbit agony auntI'm sorry to hear that your friend is on this drug...it greatly affects the brain by increasing pleasure sensors and hormones, making it eventually impossible for the brain to produce natural chemicals that bring about happy, good feelings. A person on meth is unable to truly feel "love" anymore, it might still be hidden somewhere inside, but it takes a backseat to the drug. A brain on meth will become extremely dependent on the drug, forcing the user to think of nothing else. I would advise you to distance yourself though it might be hard to. This friend will or has already changed drastically from the person you knew since it affects the frontal lobe which deals with personality and emotion. DO NOT give them money. DO NOT allow them to stay over or be alone with them. Meth affects mood and personality, they can snap on you. Try to get them to rehab (with aid of other friends) but if that fails, distance yourself. Again, I'm sorry but if your friend refuses help, he cannot be forced and cannot heal.

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