A
male
age
51-59,
*oz13
writes:Hi,Thanks for any help on this. I have recently become involved with someone who works close to me. It started out simply as emails which graduated to a certain intimate aspect. We have since become physically involved. She is currently separated from her husband but living in the same house as he. She does not want to divorce him until her last child has graduated from high school and moved on which wont be for several years. She says that she makes it clear to him that they are separated and will divorce when the time comes. She tells me that he understands this, and he does not involve himself in her life. She does feel, however, that he would not want her to date someone and so she does not tell him that she is spending time with me. I am not sure how I feel about this situation because on the one hand, she makes sense that she does not want to hurt her children. Her marriage is loveless and he is ultra-controlling. It was an arranged marriage years ago and she is waiting to get out. Additionally she does not want me to talk about it to others.Can this be a legitimate situation, or is this wrong?Again, thanks for any help.
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male
reader, Coz13 +, writes (23 April 2011):
Coz13 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your advice. I really appreciate it.
A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (22 April 2011):
 "Smells shady to me" plus "do you want to be part of it? - how long do you put your life on hold".Things did not just got to the point they are now. It's not that one thing lead to the other. She wanted it to happen. You are where she wants you to be. And you're expendable.If you were a woman, and the person claiming to be in a "loveless" marriage were a man, people would simply call you a mistress.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (22 April 2011):
 smells shady to me.very few states that i know of allow legal separation when living in the same home.i think she's handing you a line.be careful if he's controlling and angry and you get found out it could be problems...
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A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (22 April 2011):
 It could be legitimate but do you want to be part of it? If so, how long do you put your life on hold for?
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