A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Im 47 a housewife just divorced my husband. We've been married for 20 years. He is a control freak and very selfish. Im not happy with him for many years but just dont have the encourage to leave him. Now Im on my own. Soon after my divorce I met this man. He is 65 years old. We've been together for 6 months now. We get on well. He've got his house and has good income. I've got my house but Im unemployed at the moment. I've no qualification so it's difficult to find job. I've been doing baby-sitting. Well every little helps. He never helps me with money and is very mean with money. I still like him because he gives me a lot of attentions which I never had with my husband for years. I know this not love but I dont want to leave him. I dont know what is going on in my mind. Please help.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2007): I think you are clinging onto him like a comfort blanket! He is mean with money, you are doing a bit of babysitting to get some cash together. There is a large age gap, which isnt an issue in my book but i think it could be with you two. You have to ask yourself why you are actually with him. What do you two actually do together that keep this together? You are still very young, why are you wasting your time like this. Firstly why dont you go back to school/college, maybe nightclass and get some qualifications? How about doing a computer course. If you do your ECDL (European Computer Driving Licence) you can have that on your CV and it is recognised qualifications by employers. If you are on Social, which i guess you are, sorry if i am wrong, then they will pay for you to go on this course. I did it a few years ago when i lived with just my son. I now have that qualification and a job to go with it. Or is there something else you would like to try? At the age of 47 you have quite a few working years left.
Is your confidence maybe at an all time low? You will boost it up if you get back out there and get some learning done.
Also, stop and ask yourself why you need him in your life if you dont love him. Sorry, but i think you deserve better and stop doing yourself down. You will meet someone who you love and who loves you but not with him around and under your feet. I would get him out of your life and meet someone, NOW!!
Please, rejig your life now, this is not a rehearsal, this is the real thing. So stop wasting another minute.
take care
xx
A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (13 November 2007):
 Hi,
I dont know what you want anyone to say.
You dont want to leave him, but you know he is mean. So what is the point of being with him.
You may get a bit of attention, but its early days. You can bet your life that will change.
You are the same age as me, and you dont have to settle for a man that will never do anything for you. There are plenty of guys out there that will be better. Dont swap one bad man and replace him with another. The world is your oyster as they say.
XX
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