A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:how can i ask my b/f to do the right thing when his mum won't let him be classed as in a relationship with me, she bullies him every time he sees her which is only 2 collect his money as she won't let him use his own bank account, we've been together for 2 years almost but she used 2 like me, now it's like i've done something so bad. i know he loves me, but does he love me enough 2 understand how it feels, he's hurting because of his mum, then he hurts for what she says about me, then we both hurt as were being pulled apart for her own abbussive ways, how can we solve this with=out splitting up?
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female
reader, Probablylucy +, writes (27 January 2012):
 It says that your age range is 36-40, so I shall assume that this is the general age range for your boyfriend too? if so, then the mother, really, should have no say in the matter. He is an adult, and his mother needs to let go. She should have no say in her son's love life, its his personal life, and even if she dislikes you for whatever reason, its no need to let if effect your personal lives together.
However, since he 'collect money from her' I assume that he is financially dependent form her? If so, he might feel guilty and feel as if he owes her something, so is letting her meddle in your relationship. Perhaps if you both became financially independent this would become less of an issue? Yes, your mother should always be part of your life in a nice, caring, supportive sense, but this is over the top, the man needs his freedom and you need to let him know that his mother is ruining what you have.
I hope this helps!!
Lucy x
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