A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I graduated from highschool in 2010, and there was this one teacher who I had two years straight who I got really close to. She is 7 years older than me, and every guy at the school at the very least, thought she was stunning. Also she was married, but during those two years her husband had a fly in fly out contract job where he'd be gone for four weeks and be back for two. She'd tell me things about him like how he'd like going out places like movies on his own, or how he was religous and would go to church, and she wouldn't because she didn't believe in it.In my first year of having her, I didn't think much of her except that she was amazingly good at what she taught, and that she was also a lot of fun. She would openly talk to me about all things sexual, like I'd ask her if she walks around her house naked, she'd say yes, or she'd talk to me about threesomes etc, etc...I never thought much of it except maybe thats just the kind of person she was. And because talkin about it with her was just a lot of fun, she just felt like anyone of my mates.Next year, was when I started to really get feelings for her. She started being even nicer to me. She'd always be offering me her DVDs to borrow, and other guys in the class would also ask to borrow them and she'd flatout say no to them. I know that she also started talking about me to her other class in our year group, where she'd apparently bring me into random conversations and say how she thought I was cute etc, etc, and I'd hear about this almost weekly. I also used to do after school classes with her (not that I really needed them, I just wanted to flirt with her :/), and she'd talk to me about all kinds of dirty crap, and just about everything else in her life. Actually thats pretty much all those 'classes' were. And on top of this, later she'd keep telling me there was a certain movie she wanted to see, but had no one to see it with.So I ballsed up one day, asked her if she wanted to go out and watch it with me. She said yes, and told me to give her a day and a time. So I did the next day, but it turned out that day she had a 'girls night out'. I was gutted, I thought; you could've at least had a better excuse than that. I'd felt like she'd been messing with me.We kinda started to talking less after that, coz I felt pretty embarassed towards her about it. Made things a little awkward. I'd still go to those extra classes, and she'd still try to talk sexual, but I'd lost some interest.Now this had happened relatively close to the end of the year. So we soon had moc exams. So I finish the exam for my subject, and then a day or two later out of the blue I get an email from her telling me about my exam mark, and how now I didn't need to worry, and how amazingly well I had gone. I then asked other people in my class if they'd gotten theirs, and no one had. Everyone else got theirs simultaneously almost a week later. I emailed her back a bit, and she started telling me these things about who much she was going to miss me now that school was finished etc etcAnd so from that email we started an email correspondence. And it has continued up until now. Although now I have to admit it has started to die down a bit. Early on after I graduated, she kept telling me she wanted me to visit her at school, and that we needed to go out together sometime. I never followed her up on any of it. I just figured she was being nice/polite, and wasn't being all serious, like I feel she was about that movie. Even though the whole time I kept wishing/hoping she actually meant it.I have only seen her once since then. I got invited by some girl the year below me to go to her ball, and I mentioned it to the teacher who said she'd go coz I was going. I get there, and before I even see her I hear shes been talkin to other students about our emails and how she wanted to see me. She soon came and found me and gave me the longest hug, and I just put my face right up against hers during it, ran my hand through her hair and she reciprocated. Two of us were together nearly the whole night.So yeah, long story short, in school I got these crazy feelings for this teacher. But a part of me really, really wants to get over her. In a way its a good thing our emails are starting to run dry, as that'll probably help. But she was so beautiful, and I got along with her so well...One thing I've always wanted to know though, is did she have any deep feelings for me? I honestly have no idea, as there are so many contradicting factors. Also our emails to each other started dying out right around the time her husband finished his contract, so I get the feeling she was only acting that way to me because she wanted some male attention.So based on what I've said, does anyone think she may have felt something for me? Or was she just leading me on, messing with me? I always think about this crap, it drives me insane. So maybe someone here could help me with my piece-of-mind.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2012): I think you should go with your gut instincts here. Judging from the post, she was probably flattered by your attention, and indeed lonely because her husband was away. But she indeed, probably never seriously considered you.
It's sad, and it was selfish, unprofessional and disrespectful not only to her husband, but to you as well for her to play on your feelings in this way.
Let the emails dry up, go out and meet new people. Let this become a memory, looked upon only sporadically as you realise there are worthier women out there, ones who don't play games with people's hearts, especially not their students.
Flynn 24
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2012): Hi sweetie, to answer your question about deep feelings, no it is clear that she did not have deep feelings for you or probably any man in her life. She is very foolish and unwise to be giving you a student these mixed signals and be unprofessional.Find a lovel girl that is not a teacher to pay attention to and your feelings about this girl will all disappear in time.This will give you something to concentrate on while your crazy feelings go away. Do not give in to the crazy feelings and you will be stronger and have better character for it. Nothing wrong with having a few crazy feelings but giving in is not good, the wisdom in you is trying to tell you something. Feeling kind of bad about the feelings for her but feeling crazy is just a kind of lust and that passes in time, lust doesnt take you anywhere good and can be destructive.I have been your age as a women and also your teacher age and come from a wise place :) so you can trust this advice.
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