A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend has this obsession with boobs. He is constantly grabbing mine. In the beginning, when we were first dating.. he grabbed mine and said "These are D cups". He claimed to be an "expert" in boobs. The last woman he was with before me that he fell hard for had implants. (She broke his heart - didn't want anything serious.) And he bought boobs for his ex-fiance. He and the last girl he was with before me still keep in contact. In fact, a few months ago, he "jokingly" asked her to send him a pic of her "melons" and she did. He didn't delete a pic off his phone of his ex-fiance's boobs until a couple months ago, after I begged him because I thought it was disrespectful to me. (His initial excuse for not deleting it after committing to me and me moving in is that he bought them)The problem is this... since I have been with him, I have lost 20 pounds and now am a "C" cup. I still think I have decent sized nice boobs, but he constantly talks down to me about my boobs. He calls them "little boobs" and even calls them "utters". I have talked to him about how much he hurts my feelings when he constantly talks about them, but he just cant help himself. He watches porn all the time, saves forwards of naked women, and drools over big-breasted women we pass on the street.How am I supposed to feel confident and good about myself when he is constantly .. what I feel ... is disappointed about my boobs?
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boobs, his ex, porn Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2010): dump him he is being a pervert
A
female
reader, ChristineAvril  +, writes (7 April 2010):
 If he wants "udders", let him date a cow!If he disparages your boobs, make snide comments about his manhood and how it doesn't match up to those porn stars you see - rhen dump him.....
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A
female
reader, SeXylOvE12 +, writes (7 April 2010):
 C cup? I only wish i had a C cup! I have a B cup, and my boyfriend has never complained. He loves me for me and doesn't care what size i am.
I was even thinking about getting implants (for me, not him) and i was gona get a C cup. You are very normal, perfect even.
This guy has an obsession and it sounds like he's not gonna get over it. Find a guy that loves you for you, not your boobs.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2010): I think I'd re-think any relationship with a man who "bought" his ex's boobs. Thats just weird. Ok? Its weird. I think its time to sit him down and say "this is what you are getting. Love me for me, or get out". If he can't love people for who they are but feels the need to "perfect" them (by buying them boobs!!) he is not a keeper. And if he also downtalks you he comes off as a controlling manipulative guy who is only interested in talking you down so much that you will give in to his dream of having implants for every woman on earth.
But I assume that besides this little problem, he is the perfect man? There's got to be some good reason you allow this to go on. Just be wary of those red flags. And yeah, keeping his ex's boob pictures... eeewww...
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A
male
reader, A Man +, writes (7 April 2010):
From a man, dump him. We men are rarely quick to call a guy a perv, but this guy is one. You need to find someone who isn't obsessed with boobs and will treat you well.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, jaime90  +, writes (7 April 2010):
 he has a problem with a c cup? are you kidding! thats not little, its normal.
he is probably hoping you will give in and want implants too like his exes.
this guy sounds like an arrogant jerk honestly. does he have a six pack, ripped arms and pecks?
tell him to either never talk about it again. if he does say it again, leave or tell him to leave and don't talk to him. he will get the idea that its not ok to say those things.
if he still can't get it tell him you have had enough and leave. its not worth how he is putting you down!
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A
male
reader, Mercutio6 +, writes (7 April 2010):
This is always easier said than done, but you need to leave this guy. He obviously has no respect for you, doesn't care about how he makes you feel, is selfish, and is extremely immature. If this is what attracted you to him in the first place, then you will have to live with a lifetime of humiliation.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2010): Leave his ass so fast and never look back! His treating you this way is causing your health! Losing weight and mental anxiety over your physique? That is just absurd! He is completely disrespectful and careless. I am sure you are lovely in every way, hun... Be with someone who can see that, see you for more than your boobs. I'm kind of getting the feeling that is all he was interested in the first place. I'm sorry, but really, leave him. Might be hard to hear, but there is more to life and love than BOOBS! And quite frankly, I don't get the sense he can see beyond that.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 April 2010):
 The answer to your question at the end is this: there's no way for you to feel confident in this guy due to his boobsession.
I am going to try to put this as diplomatically as possible, but honey, don't you think you should be dating a man with some class? This one doesn't have it, sorry.
Either you learn to live with it or you leave. He sounds like a boor to me.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (7 April 2010):
He's an expert in being a complete ass, that's what he is. There's nothing wrong with you at all. It's just that I'm sad to say you picked the joker of the pack on this one. Dump him.
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