A
female
age
30-35,
*herryave11
writes:hi, everyone!my boyfriend and i have been in a relationship for 2-3 months now (dating 2 months prior). He first initiated and confessed his feelings, he first said i love you, and he made sure he held hands with me in public even to this day. i mean, he does get jealous when I ooh and aah over commercial dudes, which is just plainly for entertainment. But, I can't blame him for feeling down lately.. like a few weeks ago, he quit his job and his grandma passed away (which I went to the funeral and everything and plus, his grandma was like his mom to him) and I know he had it rough. Last week starting from Saturday, he hadn't contacted me till Monday. So on Tuesday, I contacted him in the morning and just said I was worried and was planning to go to his place Friday. And in between, I did not contact him. I just went and just went to be next to him. And he said to me he was thankful for my company and hugged me tight. On Saturday, we went to a musical, in which we both wanted to see. But, after that, he went MIA since Sunday. I sent him ONE cute emoticon at around 3pm. He saw it and didn't respond (I assumed he was sleeping till then cuz he can.. trust me). I was concerned, so I called him in late evening (at around 5-6pm) but he wasn't picking up and signal went long. So, I'm just wondering.. is this his way of saying he wants space? Cuz if it is, I want to tell him in person.. plus, we have a wedding to go to together (he invited me as the +1). He keeps telling me I don't have anything to worry about, but you know girls.. :( I haven't contacted him all day today. Should I keep it that way? Because I personally think disappearing like this makes no sense.. But I would have to meet him in person because of the wedding.. But now I'm just confused whether or not going to the wedding together is still in place..... but should i call it quits after a certain amount of days? Or what should I do? please, no haters. I'm just immensely curious and hurt. Thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2014): I think it was a bit too early for hm to go a musical.,people often feel guilty after a loved one passes away even to smile, musical it was an entertainment. This is what mourning period is for: to morn. Especiallyof his grandma was so close to him. When my mom passed away I would go from periods of total isolation to wanting to be among people badly. Ussualy when I did get to be around people, I wanted to hide for days and not speak to anyone. I thought people were indifferent to my sorrow because they joked around, laughed when I was morning my mother. I think that upcoming wedding is the last thing on your boyfriend's mind right now. All you need to do is to show him that you are there for him. Visit hm again, and see the reaction. If he wants to be alone, just leave him to It . He will come around, he just needs time. And please don't act like its all about you, because it is not. His action right now should not be taken personally.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2014): He obviously has a hell of a lot going on, so you've got to be quite tactful and don't make it all about how you're feeling.If he isn't answering I'd maybe send a text explaining that you're confused and understand he has a lot going on, but the way he is choosing to deal with it by ignoring you is hurting you. You can request he simply asks for space if that's what he needs right now and you'll be happy to wait until he contacts you - but say you're his partner and anything you can do to help him through this time you'd be happy to, even if he just wants someone to sit with him and watch a movie. If he does want space then you can ask him that he just gives a quick call or text so you at least know he's ok in a weeks time, and if you don't hear you should just pop by his house.He might need to see a doctor, depression can creep up out of nowhere and hit someone hard, he's lost a relative who meant the world to him so he is going to just be feeling like shit. Heck he's probably feeling so shit he doesn't know what the hell he wants to do. Why not take some food over to him, and just sit down and be there with him. Don't talk about too much, just be near him and show him that you care and you're not going to force him to share his feelings - but if he does just listen.Tricky time for the poor guy.
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