A
male
age
36-40,
*lue_warrior
writes:As I've mentioned previously on this site, I'm in the habit of frequenting brothels on a weekly basis. However, after soliciting the advice of some of the regular contributors here, I've decided to refrain from sleeping with sex workers while I wait to undergo an STD test. (Erotic massages with happy endings will have to suffice during that period).The thing is I'm not sure that I can refrain from sleeping with sex-workers indefinitely. It's a part of my regular routine and is an integral part of my well-being. If I'm not sleeping with a different woman every week, I become irritable and feel almost emasculated. It's like I need to get intimate with sex-workers in order to lead some semblance of a normal life. In the opinion of some of the more experienced contributors here, is it possible that I'm suffering from some form of sex addiction? Once again, thanks a lot.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (8 May 2014):
 I don't think it's sex addiction. Because if that was the case, you'd probably see how it is far better, and more logical and healthy as well, to get a steady girlfriend whom you can have sex with on a daily basis without running the risk of an STI or cashing out a lot of money and contributing to human trafficking at the same time.
Remember, action defines who you are, not the other way around. If you want a steady girlfriend, or a wife in the future, then you're digging yourself into a hole with this prostitution business.
If you are seriously concerned about your health and possible addiction, then see your doctor. Not online people who have no way of giving you a proper diagnosis.
A
female
reader, Euphoric29  +, writes (8 May 2014):
Dear OP,
Yes, I think it's possible - and very likely - that you suffer from some kind of addiction. If you define addiction as something like that:
1) a behavior that you initially enjoyed, because it brought pleasure or numbed a negative feeling
2) a behavior that has become more frequent than you feel is healthy for you
3) a behavior which dominates your thoughts and your every day life
4) a behavior you would like to reduce, but can't on your own, because you feel some sort of withdrawal symptoms and craving
5) a behavior that you keep on repeating, even though you are aware it has negative long term consequences for you
I would urgently recommend psychotherapy (cognitive behavior therapy, not psychoanalytical). Because the feelings of irritability and emasculation and having to lead a "semblance of a normal life" - in opposition to leading a fulfilled life according to your definition - make me suspect that you are a very unhappy person and you need help. What you are doing must be financially and emotionally dangerous (not to even mention STDs). To only share physical intimacy with complete strangers - to not even have a regular prostitute you could build any form of trust with - makes you sound like one of the loneliest people in the world.
There is also a screening test (SAST) to see if you have a sexual addiction problem:
http://www.sexhelp.com/am-i-a-sex-addict/sex-addiction-test
When looking at the results, it's important to compare yourself with the clinical sample. Just to say, screening test are designed to spot people who might have a problem, but they are not exact enough to make a reliable diagnosis for everybody. You need to see a professional about that.
Good luck. And please don't wait much longer until you do something about it. Life has so much more to offer than just sex and it's not nearly as important to well-being as is advertised.
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