A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:HiI am married but still in love with a married man. I left the company since a year. We fell in love andwe have not really spoken about it but we realised it quite late,few weeks before I left. I am married but do not know what to do now. He expressed his feelings that he would me miss loads( written in a card). I wish he never gave me that card.Am I no longer in love with my husband? I have tried loads of things ... Like going on holidays and greater responsibilities at work... ( different workplace) ...
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male
reader, Garbo  +, writes (28 May 2015):
 No woman should ever, ever! believe anything that a married man is telling her, unless she is his wife. Same with the guy who confessed his "feelings" to you. You maybe infatuated, or like others are saying, compensating for what's missing in your marriage, but I highly doubt that whatever "feelings" that other guy expressed to you means anything more then an orgasm for him. I'd suggest you work on your marriage so that your husband gains qualities you saw in that man who was attempting to cheat on his wife. Tell your husband that you'd want him to do things that the other guy did. Therefore, throw the card away from that man and get to the task of rebuilding your marriage. In vast majority of cases of cheating wives, the reason they cheat is neglect by their husbands. Seek out to remedy that... and no, you are not no longer in love with you husband but just in doubt of how he is expressing his love to you, if he does at all. That may need fixing and it does not get fixed by jumping to another married man.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2015): Perhaps you're missing something in your marriage, and turned to someone else to fulfill that deficiency. This usually happens when there is no open-communication between partners. If YOU don't know what it is you're missing, your husband can't fix it.
Maybe it's just the intrigue of a secret-romance; that gives you an adrenalin-rush. You won't feel regret or remorse unless you're caught. Guilt is already eating at you; because you do have a conscience. You are strong enough to ignore your conscience. Yet, you're not strong enough to save your marriage.
Isn't the real question, do you love your husband enough?
It's more convenient to conduct an affair behind your husband's back. It's harder to come clean and tell him what it is you need at home that you're not getting. Why is that?
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A
male
reader, SouthernHuman +, writes (27 May 2015):
1. Whatever you do: be honest. There's only way to solve this mystery.
2. Be fearless. Apparently two men love you. Don't be afraid to be honest. Someone else will love you for your strength, down the line, if these two guys crash and burn.
3. Figure out how you feel about your husband independent of there being any other person in the picture. You have a legal relationship with and responsibility to your husband; resolve that issue, then deal with the married man you may or may not be in love with.
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