A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey Cupid,I just need some advice. I will put the picture together for you.. Im 20 years old and am from and living in the UK. My boyfriend who i have been with for just over a year, is in the US Navy and living in california with work. We fly to see each other every 2 or 3 months for about a month, until he gets out of the navy at the end of 2010. However i am so broody at the moment, we were together over christmas and eventhough i took my pill everyday, i keep feening for a baby. We've talked about it and whilst he hasnt agreed, he hasnt said no either. I watch endless birth documentaries, my sister has just had a baby and ive found myself deep into her baby books, me and my bf looked after the baby together whilst he was here and he was so good with her. I dont want to 'ruin' my life having kids young, but i think about having my own family alot more than having a big career. Am i living in a little world of my own?
View related questions:
christmas, navy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Denise32  +, writes (29 December 2009):
 I agree with everyone else's advice about waiting until you and your boyfriend can be together on a permanent basis. When he gets out of the Navy and knows what his career options are, and gets settled in a job, then you can both think seriously about having a baby.
In the meantime, why not spend as much time as you want (and your sister will permit) with her baby, and enjoy looking after it? She'll probably be only too happy to have you babysit so she can get out of the house from time to time!
A
female
reader, pril +, writes (29 December 2009):
Ok. U r 20 u need to wait. Trust me. I had a baby at 25 I wish I would have waited. I love my little girl more then any thing and could not imagine life with out her but haveing kids is very hard work. U lose a lot of sleep. U don't matter any more only the baby. Anyway u do what u want. If u feel the need that bad try buying a puppy and u will see how hard that is just times it by 10 and that is what it is like to have a baby. I hope this helped.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2009): I personally feel that your relationship as you have described is a bit too up in the air right now to be thinking about children.
It would be better when you two are together on a regular basis as having children is extremly difficult without emotional support.
I say leave it for awhile
...............................
A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (29 December 2009):
Kind of, but don't worry about it. You've done all the research with documentaries, baby books and you've even seen that your sister has a had a baby, so well done for finding out abut things. What you haven't checked is the finance and the lifestyle. On average, in Britain, a child will cost up upwards of £120,000 in the 18 years you are legally obliged to pay for it, then countless more thousends of pounds on top. You'll suddenly find you can't go out with friends. You won't be able to have holidays. You will have a lot of sleepless nights, morning sickness while you're pregnant. Your baby will suddenly become number one, and you will have no real control over it. You will have to provide it with a good lifestyle, a good education, a good home and such. And your boyfriend is coming out the navy, so does he know what he's doing after? You need to be able to support the child, and that must come first. My advice is to stay on the pill and just make sure you and your boyfriend are in a more suitable position. There is no rush at this stage. Just wait until you can afford the baby, and you are sure you and your boyfriend want to be together.
...............................
|
