A
female
age
30-35,
*reed
writes:i've been talking to this guy for about a month now, but i've known him for years. he is a really nice guy and i like him. but this past weekend my friend had a party, so i invited him. we both had had a lot to drink, and we ended up in her parents bedroom. i don't know how it happened, but i ended up losing my virginity...i really had not control over what happened because i was drunk. i remember telling him i didn't want to but we did it anyway. it's been weighing on my mind ever since.. am i a bad person for losing my virginity when i was drunk?
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female
reader, jreed +, writes (26 January 2009):
jreed is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much, that really helped a lot!
i'm glad i'm not alone
A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): Let me first say, no you are definitely not a bad person.
I lost my virginity in exactly the same circumstances and I felt like s**t after it.
I would cringe at the thought of it for quite a while until I had sex for the first time sober and with someone I loved.
That was when I realized virginity is only a physical thing and not as big a deal as people say it is, that the first time I "made love" was the really special moment for me it will be for you too. You might have had sex but you have not yet made love and that's the one you should be looking forward to.
It takes a bit of time but you'll be able to look back at it and roll your eye's, not caring.
Your not the only person to give in to the heat of the moment. ;)
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A
female
reader, jreed +, writes (26 January 2009):
jreed is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni cannot remember that clearly, but i'm pretty sure i changed my mind and said okay. but i kno that if i wasn't drunk i definitely would have said no. if you have any advice for me it would be deeply appreciated.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2009): Please clarify, you "told him you didn't want to but you did it anyway", did you change your mind and agree to do it? Or did he just continue after you said you didn't want to?
I need ot be clear before I can advise you because this is a sensitive issue and the wrong advice could create more problems.
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