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How long do I wait until I tell him I've made up my mind, and want to break it off?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 May 2007) 4 Answers - (Newest, 26 May 2007)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I recently told my bf of almost 9yrs I wanted to separated for a while. We started dating when I was 16, and I feel I have changed. He wants to marry and I don't. I told him that and I needed time to figure out what I want. He said it breaks his heart, but he will leave. He still wants to be a "couple". How long do I wait until I tell him I've made up my mind, and want to break it off?

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (26 May 2007):

DV1 agony auntTell him that you care for him, but that you don't love him enough to be his partner.

DV1

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A male reader, kenny United Kingdom + , writes (26 May 2007):

kenny agony auntI agree with DV1, you have got to tell him ASAP. The longer you leave it the harder it is going to get. I know its hard but sometimes we have got to be cruel to be kind. Sure he is going to be upset, but it will be a weight off your shoulders that you was upfront and diden't lead him on. Tell him that you no longer love him anymore and move on, over time he will come to accept this.

All the best x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2007):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

How do I tell him though? He went to a camp ground, and is planning on staying there and bouncing between them. He wants to wait for me. I've told him that I love him, but am not in love with him. He's so in love with me that he doesn't want to accept I'm serious. I've done everything, and he still won't let me be.

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A male reader, DV1 United States +, writes (26 May 2007):

DV1 agony auntYou don't wait. Tell him A.S.A.P. The longer you wait, the more damage you're going to do to him. Tell him that he needs to find someone that's going to make him happy, but it can't be you.

DV1

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