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With holding of sex

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 November 2012) 11 Answers - (Newest, 28 November 2012)
A male United States age 26-29, *oteveryoneisperfect writes:

why is it when my girlfiend with holds sex its okay but when i do she gets mad about it?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (28 November 2012):

You both are emotionally ill prepared to be engaging in sexual intercourse.

Age is a factor yes, but had you been 24 and asked the same question I would still say you are clearly not responsible, accountable, honest, loving enough to be having a sexual intimate relationship with anyone.

Loving Adult Relationships have no room for games, manipulations, emotional abuse.

Break of the relationship and stop having sex and seek some individual counselling to gain some life skills.

This way you are better prepared to act in a loving manner and will better select a loving companion to BUILD a LIFE TOGETHER when you are better able to be of the mind and standards of what promotes HEALTHY ADULT Relationships based on friendship and kindness.

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A male reader, Serpico United States +, writes (27 November 2012):

If either of you is using sex as a manipulative tool, and it sounds like you both are, you probably shouldnt be in a relationship.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2012):

For the same reason she wants to know how many girls you've slept with while only telling you she's "had a lot of sex:"

http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-do-i-deal-or-forget-her-past.html

You obviously didn't listen to yesterday's advice that you didn't want to hear, and you probably won't listen to today's advice that you don't want to hear, so you might as well just hand your dick and balls over to her right now.

Not even a legal adult and you're already whipped, just make sure you put a cap on it because if you knock her up, then whatever dreams, goals or plans you may have for the future will fly out the window.

If this is how you define "love," then you face a miserable, anguished, tormented future. As one uncle suggested yesterday, she must carrying some heavy duty baggage to be so effed up sexually at such a young age.

You'd be well served to avoid her until she gets the professional help she needs, but you probably won't wise up until it's too late and you're her baby daddy and personal slave.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2012):

Tell her you are just not in the mood to do the things she probably wants to do, like cuddle or talk or go out. See how well that goes over.

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A female reader, chigirl Norway +, writes (25 November 2012):

chigirl agony auntWhy is it you are having sex when you're not legal yet? You should both be witholding sex, unless you want to wind up preggers at 16.

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A male reader, Fatherly Advice United States + , writes (25 November 2012):

Fatherly Advice agony auntnot everyone,

The direct answer to your question is:

Because she has the power and you do not.

Also it is also o k for guys not to be "in the mood".

FA

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A female reader, peteloevely United Kingdom +, writes (25 November 2012):

peteloevely agony auntare you guys doing it on purpose? to piss each other off?... i can’t ask your girlfriend, but are you? do you do this to control her or are you genuinely just not in the mood? because that is not withholding...

your question races questions!

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A female reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth India +, writes (25 November 2012):

Foot-In-My-Mouth agony auntMaybe she just doesn't want to have sex all the time? Thought about that? No one is always in the mood. So when you don't want to have sex, she shouldn't get angry and vice versa. Play a game of scrabble instead, or just cuddle and go off to sleep. But personally I think 17 is too young to be having regular sex.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2012):

It's not okay to "withhold" sex as that indicates a form of punishment. But there are many reasons why a person may not want to and that's fine.

You get mad when she does and she gets mad when you do. maybe you're not old enough have sex if you're both immature enough to "withhold" it.

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A female reader, person12345 United States +, writes (25 November 2012):

person12345 agony auntYou sure she's "withholding" sex and isn't just not in the mood?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2012):

Does her withholding of sex happen around once a month usually around the same time each month?

If the so, she's on her period and that's why she holds back.

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