A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My wife is a beautiful 39 year old woman and and she is a secretary in a State Social Services Office and a 65 year old superior who came to her office started an affair that lasted for 3 months before I found out. It has been 2 years and only now have I found out it wasnt this ideal man how was going to give her the baby she couldn't have with me. She said they they had sex on the floor of her office so I would never find out that she went to a hotel. I dont know how to deal with this new fact and my large family farm has been disrupted by her indiscretion and former drinking and I have almost committed suicide and we are seeking counciling. We went through a years of counciling when I first found out but for some reason the idea of my wife screwing on the floor with an old man has me thinking very differently of her.
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male
reader, Samutsen  +, writes (27 November 2007):
 I do not understand why you are not able to divorce her. you never mention any feelings towards her and you just say she is pretty. Ok. I am sure this is not the reason why you are not able to dump her.
She didnt tell you that she screwed a 65 year old man on the office floor you found out! She even told you shamelessly that she had sex on the office floor (why, to give you pain, she was not afraid of you because she has no respect towards you?) and this led you to have this terrible pain and depression?
Why dont you see? It has inflicted on you horrible pain to the point of suicide? Why dont you take the step that the honourable man would take ? Just show her the door and start enjoying life. And this will cure your pains also...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2007):
Sorry to hear this news has made you feel like you are right back at the beginning again. It is completely understandable why the new imagery would upset you and make you feel like you have to get over it again.
I think you need to try and give it some time for this new information to settle down, as you are effectively having to get over the affair again, as your mind has recreated what happened using new imagery and it is through the process of repeating the image that your mind eventually accepts it for what it was.
Give it a couple of weeks and if you don't feel any better, perhaps some more counselling will help.
Most importantly, I think you need to make sure you don't find out any more details about what happened, as no good will ever come from knowing details such as this, in fact it can only make things worse. Have this agreement in place with your wife, and no matter how tempting it might be, do not ask for more details; curiosity killed the cat!
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