A
male
age
30-35,
*aleemrodman
writes:I have been dating this girl for about 7 months, and within the first month of dating, I asked her to be my girlfriend, but she said she wanted to take it slow. This is because she has gone through some rough things in her past, so I understood. We continued dating and now it has been 7 months. Since I felt like there was no direction with us, I wanted to ask her again after so many months. The thing is, she has been busy with research projects at school, so I thought I would wait until her project is done, which it will FINALLY be at the end of this week. However, she was talking to me a few days ago about how family problems are bringing her down, school, not having enough time for friends, etc. She feels depressed and sad. Instead of dragging this "relationship" out with her and not knowing where we are heading, I was going to ask her what she wants out of this "relationship" this week, but now I'm considering all the baggage she has. What should I do? I want to be there for her no matter what, but I feel like my feelings are going to be at stake. I need some advice.I know she likes me. I mean every time I make plans with her, she comes through, is affectionate and loving, always tries to pay for our meals, and is just a great person, but I don't know why things are the way they are. Is it my fault for not asking again after so many months?When I do end up asking her...should I slowly bring it up at dinner time? Or should I surprise her with the question straight up and ask her right before I drop her home? If she says "maybe" or "i'm not sure" at this point, should I keep dating her and supporting her or should I leave and never come back?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (2 December 2013):
 does she contact you and set things up or is this a one way pipeline where you do all the initiating and she's just going along for the ride?
you are quite young... if you are happy and she's happy and things are going smoothly why can't you just enjoy the ride?
or do you want to start planning marriage and babies?
A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (2 December 2013):
The only thing you should worry about is if you are dating each other exclusively. Labels are for clothing.
Honestly though, she might not see you as a good partner for the long term. Maybe you fit well in her current situation but she doesn't see a future.
Or, she just might dislike labels.
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