A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I'm 25 years old,and had quite the reputation about dating women which I am not proud of but I was never in love hence played the field..About 2 years ago I started dating this beautiful girl,she is beutiful inside out,has a heart of gold andd I was instantly drawn to her!and we'v been together since then!I keep complimenting her,like the other day we were at a party and she walked up2 me and I told my mate 'isn't she gorgeous'..and I do this all the time,so yesterday she told me she's flattered but she gets a little embarassed with these compliments thrown at her all the time!what I want to know is these compliments are genuine and I can't stop myself from saying it!but I have to!my question is 'why don't girls like compliments'? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2013): Not all girls dislike being complimented. Your girl in particular feels shy about it, thats all. You dont have to stop complimenting her, just be more subtle.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (2 May 2013):
 I love when my husband compliments me in private.
IF he did to me what you did to your gf I'd be embarrassed and upset with him too. I'm not a possession and I'm not on his arm to make him look good
what goes on between us is private no need to bring his friends in.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2013): I understand exactly how she feels. I am much older but I am a pretty woman, I exersice a lot and have good body. Men look at me, even when my husband is there. One night my husband was picking me up from my dance class, and it was very hot outside, I came out without covering my belly in my dance outfit. When we were passing a group of young men, they stopped talking and stared at me. It was embarrassing, I realized that I should cover myself, and put my short one, even said, o, sorry. One of the guys joked, that he liked it more how it was before. it was flattering for me, and even my husband seemed to look flattered also. Though it was an entertaining situation, and it was nice to realize that younger men think I m beatifull, it was very embarrassing to me when my husband started telling about this episode to a group of people at the next party we went to. My husband has a habit of bragging about men hitting on me. I don't understand why he does it. He even went to his home country last year, and even told my school friend that when we went to Germany, men hitted on me all the time. First of all it was not all the time, it was only couple of times when he wasn't around, very innocently.I think he feels some how validated when he says it, but I don't like it at all. It's some sort of bragging, and bragging is never nice. If he compliments me in private that would be one thing, but no, he says it to other people.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (2 May 2013):
 Cerberus nailed it.
Save the compliments for when it's just the two of you. Trust me a smile can do a lot more then some compliments that doesn't feel heartfelt.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (2 May 2013):
 I agree with Cerberus , you are not complimenting her , you are showing her off. Exhibiting owner's pride once in a blue moon is ok, all the time it gets stale and embarassing : basically, you might do it subconsciously , but what you are doing is telling people " Look at me, am I the man , or what ? look what gorgeous piece of a.. I got myself, you wish you had something like that, don't you ? " By complimenting her so often and blatantly and calling attention on her, you are fishing for compliments for yourself.
I find meaningful that, with all her good qualities, you always brag about her for looks. It never happens, I guess, that she comes up to you and you say to your pals, Oh here's my grilfriend, she's got such an heart of gold, such a beautiful soul ! - Your gf knows you appreciates her and she likes it, but probably she does not like her prettyness to be put on display as if she were a mannequin or a wax doll.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2013): "but I have to"
No you don't, OP you say you have a reputation as a ladies man? Then why are you treating this woman like she's your property that you have to show off? She's not a car OP, she's a woman and she doesn't want to be displayed like a new toy.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2013): Girls do like compliments but they don't like being put on the spot by you constantly asking other people what they think of her. That's not a compliment OP that's just sleazy. Once is cute, twice maybe is playful but you're just making her uncomfortable now.
OP compliments are nice things, but there's a limit. You're publicly embarrassing her, you know she doesn't like it and you keep doing it.
OP it's not a compliment to force another person to agree with you. They're hardly going to say "no, she's an ugly dog, her nose looks like an erect dog's penis" are they? So it's not real, they may think she's ugly but they're not going to say that when you push them to compliment her. You're making them pay her a fake compliment, why would any woman like that? It's not real, it's just a stupid platitude that you're forcing others to pay her for selfish reasons.
OP a compliment is worthless if it means nothing. It means nothing for you to force other guys to say she's gorgeous and display her like some kind of woman you're selling.
A compliment has to mean something, like when she has just gotten her hair done and you tell her it's beautiful, or that dress makes her look like a celeb etc. "Hey dude, check out my whore, wouldn't you fuck her?" is not a compliment and that's what you're basically doing but you think you're being cute. Well you're not, you're insulting her intelligence. If you think she's beautiful then say that to her, only a fool wants others to agree with him. If they think she's beautiful they'll say it to her without you prompting them to.
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