A
female
age
41-50,
*afiabayes
writes:Why does my ex have one rule for me and another for him? My.ex snd I parted in Jan this yr. He was verbally, emotional and occasionally physically abusive to me. I wasn't battered but.he certainly had no respect.for me. I ended it and he left. It's.been 5 mths now, during this time he has tried to draw me back in but I have stood my ground even though its been really hard. I thought he'd settled into a routine with the kids and we haven't really spoke. When we did speak he asked if we could have mutual respect for each other and not introduce the kids to new partners and keep our social lives separate. I.agreed for the time being as I didn't want to unsettled them, I however do not have anyone new in my life. I was shocked when my daughter.came home after it was his wk end with our 2 kids who are 3 and 7. To hear go on about daddy s friend shell who.was at his flat, she baby sat my son while he went out with my daughter. They had tea and she was with them when he dropped them home. He knows I would be hurt by this as its not been that long since we split. Is this his way of hurting me as I don't understand why he can't keep it separate like he said he would. I haven't said anything to him as I don't want to bite but this has really hurt me .
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 April 2012):
 He obviously came up with this agreement so that you wouldn't be with anyone, but he has now met someone and has broke this, he treated you badly, can you really trust him not to be the same around your children? You say he occasionally physically harmed you, are you not scared he could lose his temper with the children or was he always a good father? If you have worries then maybe he should not be trusted alone with them. As for his new woman at the end of the day you are there mother and nobody can take that away from you, am sure he is just moving on with his life and you should do the same, it is her loss and your gain, you are much better off without him.
A
female
reader, ToHereKnowsWhen  +, writes (28 April 2012):
 You couldn't trust him to behave like a decent human being in the relationship, why would you expect him to change when it is over?
I just hope that he is capable of treating your children decently.
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