A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: My husband doesn't get turned on by intercourse. He only gets turned on by oral sex and he wants me to swallow, and I really don't want to most of the time. Why is that so important to him?
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (13 January 2023):
 I'm sorry for your loss, OP
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2023): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionupdate. My husband passed away in October. I know we had problems, but I wish he was here to work on them.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2023): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionupdate. My husband passed away in October. I know we had problems, but I wish he was here to work on them.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2022): I agree with the comments about why he might like it, but I also agree you should not do it if you don't want to do it. It is good to do things for each other cause you love someone and want to pleasure them, but the other side of that is you should never pressure your partner to do something they find really awful. My GF is not going to do oral sex for moral reasons so I accept that, but if she did I would not care if she swallowed or not. He should be grateful you are willing to do that for him at all. It is a really special thing to do for a guy and very selfless. But it is not something a guy has a right to expect automatically. I know my boundaries with my GF and I can fantasize all I want, but you should respect your partner.
Your friend, Calvin - alias
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2022): I agree with Honeypie, you two sound sexually incompatible.
If he is a rather mean, selfish lover there is not much you can do if you want to stay with him.
Have you suggested he use a toy on you? It might be better than nothing.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2022): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionChildren are not the issue now. We got married later in life after I had my children. I have had my tubes tied have gone through the change of life so that is not an issue. He says he can't help what turn him on. I was having orgasms like I have never had before, maybe my first ever, but he thinks I am selfish because I don't give back, even though I do. I stop or he tells me to stop before he reaches climax because he isn't feeling it or whatever. He wants me to insist on continuing so he can feel like I really want his pleasure. He needs me to talk to him and tell him how much I want it and do it and not stop. He use to always find fault with how I did it. I was not enthusiastic enough. I don't know what else to do.
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (17 April 2022):
 I have a question of my own: what are you getting out of this marriage? Seriously?
Are you compromising on everything you wanted, just to keep your husband happy? Did you want children and just give up on the idea because your husband didn't want any? You enjoy intercourse yet your husband seldom does it because he is afraid of you getting pregnant? Personally I suspect that is just an excuse to get constant blow jobs. If he's that set on not having children, he can have a vasectomy. Problem over. However, then he would not have an excuse not to have intercourse with you. As for expecting you to swallow his sperm when you don't actually want to, that is selfish and vile.
Is this how you want to spend the rest of your life? Again I ask, what are you getting out of this marriage?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (17 April 2022):
Why hasn't he had a vacetomy?
If he is 100% sure he doesn't want kids?
I mean sex should be pleasurable for BOTH people involved, shouldn't it?
It doesn't sound like you two are very compatible in the bedroom.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2022): BTW, do not ever use baby oil as a sexual lubricant. It causes skin irritation and yeast infections.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2022): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI didn't mention it before, but I choked and now he thinks I don't care about his pleasure at all. Once was because there was baby oil on his penis because we had just had intercourse: not because he likes it but because he knows I want it. Now I guess it's back to no sex at all. The reason he doesn't like intercourse is because he never wanted children and was afraid of making that happen, so he learned to enjoy oral instead of intercourse.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2022): why do you not want to swallow ? Is it because of the taste ? You can have him change his diet a bit and eat more fruit, especially pineapple, it makes his cum sweeter. My boyfriend has done this and I like to swallow his cum.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2022): You have every right to do as you want.
You don't have to swallow.
God did not ordain that women had to swallow their husband's sperm.
Basically what goes into your mouth is your business and your choice.
Maybe your mother insisted you swallow food as a child or maybe she just tried to tempt you to eat.
God did however make it possible for you to have children if you and hubby do the other thing with sperm and let it go walkabout through the cervix and up into the vagina and one lucky little strong sperm may make it all the way to finding your ovum and break through the shield and manage to fertilize you and start the growth of a baby if the fertilised egg lodges nicely in the womb with the potential for the placenta to grow and nourish said miraculously made potential baby.You
If you swallow the sperm it just goes into your stomach where it is attacked by acid juices and finally gets pooped out later ( unless someone can prove to me that it can be wholesomley absorbed).
So in my opinion your husband is being very anal because that's where he wants the sperm to end up, totally without the potential to do anything at all.
God did say:"Go forth and multiply."
He didn't say : "Go forth and swallow sperm so you can poop it out later!"
You may hear that sperm is good for your skin with lots of vitamins in it.
So are lots of other things!
It doesn't mean you have to try every cream in the shop!
You also normally apply face cream to the face and not the back of the throat.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (15 April 2022):
When you swallow you are being as submissive as heck, you are basically as intimate as it gets. 1. he doesn't have to stop his climax 2. if you swallow you are "accepting "all" of it, in a way. And 3. for some men it's a little bit about dominance. So if you spit, you are "rejecting" him.
If you don't WANT to swallow have a wash rag nearby and wipe your mouth after.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2022): Imagine sucking on a straw in a milkshake and the straw is being pleasured by it. The straw would be pleasured more if you swallowed ever gulp, - rather than hold the first gulp in your mouth. Then there's the slutty thing they all seem to like behind closed door.
There's something wrong with him not liking intercourse. Try mounting him him during one of your BJ's. Any old guy can get hard enough for a BJ. Maybe Viagra is in order.
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