A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I met a guy on a dating site and after talking we realized that we attended the same university. So we met up one night back in October. We had both been out that night and were drunk. We met at my apartment, started talking, started watching a movie, started kissing, things progressed but we didn't have sex because he said he felt things were moving too fast and he wanted to leave at that point. After that night I didn't hear from him, he basically disappeared. Then in January he emails me saying that he apologizes for disappearing and all that and that he would like to hang out and get to know me. I ignored that message but then last month he contacts me again apologizing again and tried to give an explanation for why he stopped talking to me after that night. I wasn't really upset about it anymore because it had happened so long ago.So we start talking again and things were going fine. Then one night last week I got drunk and I was lonely and asked him to come over. He did and we ended up having sex and now he's ignoring me again. I don't mind just having sex with him, I'm completely fine with that. But the problem is that everytime I talk to him he says that he really likes me and that he thinks we're moving too fast but I don't understand what that means. We're not a couple so what's moving too fast? I told him if he wants to get to know each other I'm up for that but we'll probably have to meet in daylight. He says "yes, that's fair." So I asked him do u want to actually date, and he responds "idk it's too early to tell but I do like you." What the hell does that mean? I didn't ask him to be my boyfriend. Isn't dating what you do to get to know someone?So I can't tell what he wants from me. He says he doesn't want to have sex but he still comes over at 2 am. He says he wants to get to know me but he doesn't want to date. Am I missing something or is he just a jerk and I should leave him alone?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2011): Sounds to me that he just wants you when he wants sex.I had an experience with a guy like this, and he would tell me how much he liked me, but he didn't want a girlfriend. He would disappear for a while,and then suddenly contact me out of the blue for a nighly call, whether I had invited him or not. We both knew the outcome of these nights. I would cling on to the hope that one day he would want a girlfriend, and it would be me. Never happened.I'd say get out now if you want more that casual sex every now and again, as chances are he won't want anything more.
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