A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend recently got back together after splitting up. Wehave a special relationship but getting back together has been very hard. One problem that seems to stand in our way is that he is always looking at other girls when we go out in public and I wouldn't care if he just looked at their faces or anything but he looks at their ass or breasts you know?He doesn't do it when he knows I am looking at him or if I catch him he says sorry and looks down but I just don't understand why he has to look. He says he doesn't get sexual thoughts or anything, he's just kind of comparing to what he has and he says he would never cheat on me and I believe him but ever since he started looking at other women I don't feel so any more. Why does he feel the need to "compare" or do you think this is just a lame excuse?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, cd206  +, writes (3 May 2007):
 It's not a lame excuse but I don't think it's the real reason why he looks at them. I think the reason is much more simple but harder to explain.... he just can't help himself. All guys look at other girls. It's a natural reflex, whether they have a girlfriend or not. The best thing you can do is let this go. You haven't mentioned any reason for me to think he's cheating or wants to cheat on you so why not accept his actions for what they are, a couple of seconds of sneaky looking. After all, it's you he comes home to every night.
CD
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