A
female
age
30-35,
*ysterygirlblue
writes:Why does the thought and act of cheating thrill me? I have cheated on my gf twice now both times on purpose. I still love her but I like to cheat I don't want to hurt her. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2011): If you don't want to hurt her, then don't do it. You either want to be in a relationship, or you want to sleep around, you can't have one or the other so you have to choose which you prefer. Normally people enjoy cheating because they like the thrill and the thought of going behind someone's back. I personally believe anyone who is capable to cheat doesn't love their partners. They may think they love them, but in reality, 'love' is a very strong feeling and if you really are in love with someone the thought of having sex or even kissing another person naturally makes you feel physically sick.I'd suggest you either stop doing it completely and be with your girlfriend, or simply split up with her.I'm sure if one day you find out the woman you loved turned around and told you she's cheated on you multiple times because she just 'likes it', you'd have a different view on cheating.
A
female
reader, mysterygirlblue +, writes (29 August 2011):
mysterygirlblue is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks everyone, I know this is something to look down upon and I know it is bad but it is truly something I struggle with. I am trying to change before it gets too bad.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2011): Is it the "cheating," or the multiple partners? If it's the deception and "illicit" nature of the thing, you're probably acting out something - some subconscious anger or pain - working it out... you'd be better off in the long run digging deep to find out what's underneath the actions - meanwhile, try to curtail your behaviour - it'll just hurt the person you're deceiving.
If, on the other hand, it's primarily the multiple partners that thrills you, there's something called "Polyamory..."
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A
male
reader, FLIPPER66 +, writes (29 August 2011):
 dude , one day if you don't change you'll be with a girl that your really into and maybe find out how thrilling it is to be cheated on by her. you can't love this girlfriend at present if you enjoy cheating on her and do it intentenally says your do enjoy hurting her and really don't care that much for her. even if at present she may not know it. onder how long she'd be there if she found out.why do i say all the above because when one loves someone they do not do things that might hurt them . matter of fact they reframe from doing them.which its obvious your not if your doing it intentionally. so keep on telling yourself that lie . maybe as you grow up which its evident your not at present you'll realize that your actions has consequences to them at some latter time in your life which will not be very good for you.unfortunatly . don't believe me man up tell this girlfriend now how many times you've cheated on her and you'll start finding out how most any relationship will end up the same way . you won't have one peroid.
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female
reader, rile962 +, writes (29 August 2011):
It's awesome that you're willing to look at your behavior and try to figure out what's going on. You might be a sex addict or a narcissist. You might have feelings that seem like love toward your GF, but you love yourself much more than you love your GF. Perhaps you love how your GF makes YOU feel, which is not the same as loving your GF. Please remove yourself from any "committed" relationships until you know what's going on within yourself. Best wishes to you.
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female
reader, person12345 +, writes (29 August 2011):
 How does this sound: It thrills me to poke people with sharp sticks, but I don't like hurting people. It's similar to what you just said. If you don't want to hurt your girlfriend, then stop hurting her. Just because you like cheating doesn't mean you have to do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 August 2011): I know the feeling completely .. I was with my partner for over a year and I kept cheating on him but I loved him :s and when we broke up over it I missed him. We got back together but I kept cheating and cheating. We have now broke up completely but I still miss him but I can't explain why I cheated. To much temptations around at one point I believe
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male
reader, Sex_counsellor  +, writes (29 August 2011):
 Most likely to be the adrenaline rush you will get from the sneaking around and the thought that you may get caught can give people an additional turn on. You need to find ways to excite and thrill you in your own relationship that stops you from wanting to cheat with other women.
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female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (29 August 2011):
 Why be in a relationship if you can't even keep it in your pants?
Seems to me your words and your actions don't add up at all. You SAY you don't want to hurt your GF, yet you do something that YOU know will hurt her.
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male
reader, HelpyMcHelperson +, writes (29 August 2011):
You say that you don't want to hurt her but you also say that you like to cheat, I'm afraid you can't have it both ways and if she finds out what you have done it will no doubt hurt her.
You need to stop cheating on her, if you find that you can't commit to a monogamous relationship it would be best to leave.
As for why cheating thrills you it could be for a bunch of reasons, it could be the thrill of doing something wrong and getting caught that turns you on, or maybe you are bored with your gf and enjoy something new sexually.
Either way this doesn't sound like a good situation for either you or your gf.
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