A
male
age
18-21,
*ilo-kid
writes:hi there good people. I'm back again for your excellent advices. here's what I've been wondering most bout: who cums first between a guy n a gal? Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, satindesire  +, writes (28 March 2009):
 You fail to notice most women ejaculating because most women DON'T ejaculate when they orgasm.
A female orgasm doesn't necessarily produce any noticeable fluids, the much-discussed 'female ejaculation' is not a clitoral orgasm, and it is not possible for all women to experience.
A woman's PC, vaginal, and sometimes even her abdomnial muscles rapidly and involuntarily contrct during an orgasm. Sometimes it is very noticeable, my husband for instance can tell because my muscle contractions are VERY strong. Some women you can't feel them at all.
A
male
reader, Milo-kid +, writes (28 March 2009):
Milo-kid is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni didnt ask this question bcos i hav a low sex drive, no no no! neither of my partners has eva complained bout not being satisfied. its jst that i fail to notice when the lady is ejaculating. i honestly didnt think it would be a sin to ask. anyway thanx a lot guys especially Dlover, sandman, nothinglasts and sitindesire. u guys really helpe. to u anonymous, i wonder which one are u lol:-)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 March 2009): A gentleman lets the woman cum first, and a real man doesn't care.
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A
female
reader, satindesire +, writes (28 March 2009):
Yes, Star, you're absolutely right! There is no gender specifications as to who doesn't bother to learn, the man or the woman. Obviously, both genders can be sexually ingorant and sexually selfish! And I apologize for making it sound as if only men are like that. I really didn't mean for it to sound the way it did.
When it comes down to it, both gender's orgasms are equally important when it comes down to a healthy and satisfying sexual relationship, and it takes communication, honesty, practice and patience. No one gets it right at first, and sometimes, to be good at sex, it takes years of learning. Sex isn't as simple as "who orgasms first", nor should it be. In the end, BOTH people should have equal oppurtunity!
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A
male
reader, OtherStarfish  +, writes (28 March 2009):
 I think your question saying its what you have wondering most about.... still I guess its better than some thoughts I have seen.
my comment on playing the game - that's the important part. It really doesn't matter who climaxes first or even if you both do.
Satindesire is right, most men don't know how to and dont ask or bother to learn how to make sex better for their partner. In defence of my gender this also works for women to.
I also think sandman is exactly right and shows how the game should be played.
I think you thoughts would be better directed to how can I be a better lover - than who wins a race.
Star.x.
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A
female
reader, satindesire +, writes (28 March 2009):
Since most young men don't know how to bring a woman to orgasm properly, and most young women are too shy to talk about what pleases them, often unfortunately men are the only ones who orgasm during sex.
Instead of worrying about 'who orgasms first', you should worry about brushing up on your female anatomy and learning how to communicate with your partner about sex. And be sure you know all you need to about birth control and condoms.
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A
female
reader, -NothingLasts4ever- +, writes (28 March 2009):
 In my relationship, I do first and then my boyfriend. That way we both get what we want.x
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A
male
reader, Milo-kid +, writes (28 March 2009):
Milo-kid is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx a lot sandman. i now understand better. as for u starfish, i'm not sure i get what u actually mean. of course i'm aware of the diseases we have. or u suggesting that i shouldn't hav asked this question? diseases or no diseases, we stil gonna hav sex. its just how we were made to live.
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A
male
reader, Sandman +, writes (28 March 2009):
 Are you asking who SHOULD cum first or who actually does by design?
By design, men will cum first because if you break it down to it's most simplest meaning; during sex men are to impregnate women. Simple and to the point.
However, in order for sex to be fulfilling for both parties involved, the man should try to make sure his female partner has been satisfied BEFORE he does. That means withholding your orgasm until your partner has had hers. The man may still reach orgasm before his partner and (in my opinion) should continue to stimulate her sexually until she reaches orgasm. However, many women will state that in order to be sexually satisfied they don't always need to have an orgasm. If this is the case for your partner then this statement is okay. But there are women out there who desire to have an orgasm with every sexual encounter. If your woman desires to have an orgasm with every sexual encounter than you should TRY to make sure this happens for her.
My former woman didn't say one way or the other. However, I felt it was my duty to ensure her sexual satisfaction and therefore I made sure she experienced at least one orgasm with every sexual encounter. It didn't happen all the time but I did TRY. It did happen about 90% of the time.
So I said all that to say - you should have sex and do so to ensure both parties are satisfied after the encounter has been completed. It really doesn't matter who cums first. Just that you both enjoyed the encounter.
Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, DLover  + ♥, writes (28 March 2009):
On the first time, the male tends to cum first. After that, it depends on the techniques and positions you use, and in which order.
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A
male
reader, OtherStarfish +, writes (28 March 2009):
sigh - the life you lead, we have famine and war disease, a limited life span on this planet and you wonder more about who cums first. sigh.
Its not a race, but how its played the determines who orgasms first.
star.
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