A
male
age
41-50,
*heDoucheBag
writes:Hi I need help!!I have been with my gf for about 4 and a half years. For the first 3 years we had a great sex life. We were ripping each others clothes off and experimenting with things ive never experienced in a relationship before.18 months ago my gf started to put on alot of weight and slowly but surely our sex life has declined. Im 29 and she is 27. I have talked to her about this and she says that she doesnt feel comfetable with her body like she did before. This I would understand however for the first 6 months that we were together she was bigger then than she is now. She then lost weight for a couple of years only to put it back on again. She didnt seem to mind at the beginning as she was very open in the bedroom even though she was just as big. I have told her that I still find her very attractive and that will never change. I have attempted to get her to exercise with me but she has two jobs and she just doesnt have the time or the pacience.I lost my job a year ago and have found it hard to get back into work as my confidence is pretty much shot. This is probably not helping matters.I am starting to feel that the constant rejection is more about the way she feels about me than her own body. Am I reading too much into this?Sorry for the long post but any help would be much appreciated.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (29 June 2010): I had this happen with my wife. Unfortunately, it went on too long and we became so disconnected, we eventually split. My advice is to focus on the love and caring, and lay off the sex thing for a bit. You need to make her feel loved, respected and beautiful. Bring her flowers, tell her you think she is beautiful. Caress her...with no sexual expectations right away. Talk with her. Do this as much as you can for a few weeks and see where it goes. If she offers her body, ravish it lovingly. Give her the best, most passionate sex you can. Make LOVE to her. Help her build her self esteem by making her FEEL beautiful. Ever see those overweight. ugly couples sitting at a buffet table? They go home and get it ON because they have 100% unconditional love for each other. I'm not comparing you to them, but just saying...
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