A
female
age
,
* from wales
writes:I met this guy on a dating site and we seemed to be getting on really well, he said some lovely things to me like i was everything he really wanted in a woman and wanted us to stay together forever ect, i did believe that we had something but now he has done the dissapearing act, no answer from txts ect, so whats going on, we did have a slight dissagreament the other night and he did seem distant after that, it was about his long work hours and how he would just fall asleep when he came to see me, i know he has to work and i never bothered him when he went home after work, but when we agreed to come to my place he would fall asleep, i felt quite insulted and told him, he said it was happening all over again as i'm almost certain thats what ended his marriage, he has been married twice, and he did say they both cheated on him, any idea whats going on anyone because i havnt.... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Midge +, writes (28 July 2008):
 Perhaps a little space is what he needs just now to look at his life and take stock of what this vicious circle. He may just out of the blue contact you when you least expect it.
A
female
reader, s from wales +, writes (27 July 2008):
s from wales is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for that and it does make sense what you are saying, my only means of contacting him are through mobile because i dont no exactly where he lives as we was only together a short while, but i still like him, i think i,m just going to leave it now, i,v asked him numerous times and he just wont reply, so i dont have any choice....if things change i will reply and let you no...
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A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (27 July 2008):
Actually I have the exact same problem with my boyfriend except its been happening for the past 8 years.
He works away a LOT. I see him very little. When he is home, he still works but comes to visit me in the evenings. He walks in, has his dinner, falls asleep on the couche and I get pissed. He too has long work hours, probably longer than your partner since he is a roadie and that means a morning start of about 5am and finishing about 2am the next morning. So he gets about 3 hours sleep when he is away, so makes up for it when he comes home.
I have learned to deal with this though. I love him dearly so have to make sacrifices in order for him to do what he does, and still have some sence of a relationship. Its not ideal by any means!
He probably hasnt called you or replied because he is upset that he has met another woman whom he has strong feelings for and he knows it wont work if you are unhappy about his hours at this stage in the game. He is probably just hurt that he knows what he is going to loose!
If this guy is someone that you truly care about you will need to find a way to make it work. Set aside time on a weekend for the both of you! Make set nights that he comes to you for a certain amount of time. Television off, its conversation and "us" time. Music, a bottle of wine and some good conversation. You will be surprised what a difference it makes when you dont see each other very much and what little time you do have together, you make the most of.
If you contact him again, dont call him, text him or anything like that, go see him face to face. Its the only way to sort it out.
Let us know what you decide to do!
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