A
female
age
30-35,
*omanticGal1
writes:I have recently have been thinking about my teenage years since now I am a young adult and I have been thinking about what I expected when I turned 16. I live in a small town but the teens here were weird. They were the party girls who slept with six guys a week, smoked cigs and pot and drank alcohol.I never was the party girl but every teen I knew was like that so I am asking other users on this site to think about what they were like when they were a teenager.And please tell me if something was wrong with me or if the teens in my town were just crazy! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2010): Not sure if you want an older guys take, but I was a teen in the 80's, and sex amongst teens was more limited than I think it is now. THe 80's marked the first big scare over AIDS and STD's, and when you talked about sex, it was like talking about something very dangerous. There were very sexually active people when I was a teen, but we were mostly experimental with alcohol and smoking stuff. It was way more social than sexual. Making out and "second base" was common, but going beyond that was not really. Closer to 18 and people were having more sex. I lost my virginity at 16 and had 3 partners in my teens...and that was fairly promiscuous in those days. 2 of them lost their virginity very young...about 14, so they were kinda slutty to me. I was in with the more "sexual" crowd. I would say about half or less the people in HS had sex of some kind before graduating. Ironically, I am now with a girl I went to HS with but did not know back then. She is gorgeous, but because she was in Young Life and was shy, she actually kept her virginity till she was about 29! So she kinda represents the more chaste women in my teens (although she is a freakin sex animal now...holy jeez). Did we miss out? Dunno...I partied enough in HS to be fun, but not get out of hand. I wish I was more sexually active in my 20's, but I was dating my future wife so I behaved for the most part. Now that I'm single again, it's like I never missed a beat. So you're never "too late" to enjoy life or be a "party girl". In fact, I think women in their 30's and early 40's are WAAAY more sexual and hot than teens (ever watch Sex in the City?). Self assured, confident, successful women are a HUGE turn on to me. Only caveat is, they've been around, so love comes more slowly...they've been to the show and seen the strings, so you have to work it a bit more as a guy. But I'm an honest, good man...not a player, so it works out.
Bottom line is, do what feels right, but keeps you grounded and in touch with who you are. Don't worry about what others are doing. Look at most successful people and you will find someone who does what makes THEM happy. And you'll usually also find followers that mimic them. Don't follow.
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reader, mystiquek  + ♥, writes (26 September 2010):
 I was shy in high school, I never dated anyone from my own school. I didn't drink, smoke, and was one of the few girls in my high school was was a virgin when I graduated. Ashamed of it? NOT AT ALL. I wasn't ready/mature enough for relationships.My friends and I used to laugh at all the popular kids who partied and stuff..they were always in trouble, so many girls got pregnant and back then, it wasn't cool at all to be pregnant and not married!! They were banned from everything, always had to leave school... I was into student council, heavily into band, and chorus and I honestly didn't have time for partying and guys. After high school I "blossomed". My high school years were happy because I wasn't worried about being pregnant, or getting caught drinking. Be who you are..do what is comfortable for you.
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reader, maverick494 +, writes (26 September 2010):
There´s nothing wrong with doing what you feel comfortable with. Partying until my head falls off and the idea of sleeping with random guys didn´t appeal to me at all, so I didn´t do that. That doesn´t mean the way I chose to ´survive´ my teen years is the best one. It´s not even the most socially accepted one anymore.
I have a friend who was really promiscuous in her teen years and is one hell of a partier. We get along just fine, because we know eachother´s boundaries. She doesn´t push me to party throughout the night and she doesn´t set me up with guys I don´t like. But it´s common to receive a text from her saying she´s sleeping over at some guy´s place.
So what is best, you ask? Doing what you feel most comfortable with and regretting nothing.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): Hey! :P
Well, I'm 16 just now, 17 in less than two months though.
I'm like you, I hate going to parties unless it's someone I know and the people who are going are my friends, because I know we won't get completely out our mind on alcohol, those parties I'm referring to here only happen once every 4 months or so, you're not weird at all! All the girls here excluding my friends and I go to parties every Friday/Saturday and get drunk, and make a complete fool of themselves on facebook and such to get attention.
Personally, at this age I feel it is more important to get the qualifications you need to pursue what you want instead of lettingpoor grades decide your future.
So to generally answer your question, I'm 16, I go to school, I study hard, I love art and I'm at art for around 5 hours a day because I want to become an art teacher, I play football, another passion of mine, and I love singing. So that's what I'm like :) you're not weird! You have standards lass ;D
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): I am still a teenager (17) and I am not like that. I used to wonder the same as you, if I was a nerd or outcast, but I still go to parties and do drink. But unlike many around me I do not need to get wasted to have fun. I don't sleep around like many and I don't take drugs. Many think and act like the teens in your town where I live, but the normal people do not aspire to be like that. I know many that do party a lot, but do not abuse drugs, the people who do that keep to themselves. The girls who sleep around are not respected by the decent guys.I don't know if this helps, but it's from my perspective. Just because something is the majority doesn't make it right from my point of view. I don't think anything was/is wrong with you, you sound like someone who actually remembers their teen years, and are not facing criminal convictions or unwanted pregnancies or S.T.Is.That is not for everyone who parties etc, but there is deffo more of it than with the people who don't need drugs and alcohol to enjoy their lives.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): Theres nothing wrong with you, everyone is different and what seperates you from them is that you have values.
I personally was a big partier but Im still a virgin, Ive experimented with drugs and alcohol, I was a huge pot head, and I was out every weekend but Ive graduated and now Im working towards the future.
It all depends on the person and their choices.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 September 2010): I'm 21 now and just graduated from university here in Toronto. To be honest, my teenage years were pretty much filled with nothing more than school work (parents were somewhat hard on me to accomplish a lot, which meant studying like crazy and skipping the usual social scene of high school most of the time). While it did help me get into a great school with an equally great scholarship, I did miss out a lot. I look back sometimes and feel I should have just lived a bit - I know the whole party scene that some teens take part in looks stupid after a while, but to be 16 again I would embrace it. Why? Because you'll never be that age again. I worked myself really hard in my teen years and matured fast - I always thought I'll party once I'm successful. But once you finish university/college, life comes at you fast. For the most part, everyone else 'grew up' out of the carefree years of their teens and matured and you look abnormal if you try to revert back to acting like a teen. Just my two cents. P.S. I'm not suggesting you go around and sleep with numerous partners for the hell of it, but do have fun while you can. Cheers!
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reader, DazedConfused  +, writes (26 September 2010):
I was one of these party girls,,, from the age of 13.
If you didnt do it, well done to you because after a few years you dont feel to good about it!
You have nothing to worry about, its great that you haven't. Just carry on as you are.
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reader, LLindy87 +, writes (26 September 2010):
 There is nothing wrong with you if you didn't sleep with six guys each week and drank and smoked, in fact thats awesome
Keep on doing the right thing and your life will be a lot easier. Its nice that you can look back and not have regrets about sleepign with a ton of ppl and what not.
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