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What to do when you're a lesbian dating a guy, confused and 22 weeks pregnant?

Tagged as: Dating, Family, Gay relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (1 October 2011) 1 Answers - (Newest, 2 October 2011)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I've been dating a guy for 3mos before I got pregnant. I'm 22 weeks now and I have mixed feelings about him. He was the first guy I've dated and spent a lot of time with in 7 yrs since I've been dating women exclusively. I have feelings for my ex gf but she's moved on and I'm still very attracted to women (rarely men).

This is complex. My unborn child's father loves me and is excited to be a new father. I have never felt comfortable enough to call him my bf. Am I a lesbian who was lonely after my ex and moved to quickly with this guy?

I want to be a mother and know he'll be a great father but my hormones are making me disgusted with him. Everything he says does and doesn't do just makes me want my ex more and strengthens my belief that dating women is what works for me. I wonder how will things work out with a newborn! In my defense he (my bf..I guess) always knew of my feelings for women and has always been comfortable. We have no trust issues..that's the upside to our relationship.

Any advice? Semi-similar situation?

View related questions: ex girlfriend, lesbian, my ex

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A female reader, AuntyAlexxmo United Kingdom +, writes (2 October 2011):

AuntyAlexxmo agony auntNothing similar but hopefully a bit of advice.

If you are pregnant and happy at thought of being a mum that is good as it one less decision to make in this difficult situation.

In my opinion i do think you rushed into this relationship without maybe thinking about it properly, more than likely because of your ex and the pain caused by that break up.

It really doesnt sound like you are attracted to this guy at all, which isnt fair to you and it isnt fair to him either, you both deserve to be with people who you want and wants you back.

You need to end it before it goes any further and you feel to trapped to leave, you need to make sure you break up on good terms so he is still excited about the baby and knows that he is still going to be involved as possible in its life.

I know the thought of being single and pregnant is horrible, but do you really want to spent the rest your life with his guy wishing you werent?

I hope this help even a little

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