A
female
age
22-25,
*ettybuttercup
writes:Hi there, I'm just wondering about my ex. He fingered me when we were together and I gave him a wank. I'm scared he's gonna tell people I know and I'm scared if my friends find out that they will break our friendship and I end up with no friends. Also I I ever get a new boyfriend, should I lie and say I've never done stuff with a lad? I wouldn't want to put him off me if I did tell him and I wouldn't want him to contact my ex. What should I do if I find out he's told someone and they ask me about it? Should I deny it?
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female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (10 May 2016):
 Chances are he most probably will anyway trying to look cool. so my advice would be if your friends ask, you respond with "a private life is meant to be just that-private and for that reason not willing to discuss it" and If you are pressed for information ,again a response similar " does it really matter what I say, people are going to believe what they want anyway. As for a new boy, tell him that you wouldn't want to talk about your relationship with him if you broke up, so you wont do it about you and your ex and to please be respectful of that.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (9 May 2016):
 Should you deny it? No, that would be lying.
The thing you REALLY need to realize is that IF you can't OWN your own actions (that is doing sexual acts with a boy) then you aren't old enough or mature enough for sexual activity.
And secondly, if you friends all of a sudden can't be your friends because you did what you did? How good friends ARE they?
Why would a boy contact your ex? What you DID with an ex is NOT the new BF's business. Now you can CHOOSE to tell him or not, that is UP to you. You can say I don't want to talk about my past. It's your life, your past... just don't lie about it.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 May 2016):
 Sweetie if you where not ready to be sexual with a boy then you should have listened to your inner mind and said no. I know why you are scared, but am afraid we cannot control what people tell others, also who is to say that people will believe him if he does tell anyone? I don't think you will lose your friends, because you have done nothing wrong, these are things that happen in a relationship and yes you are probably to young at the moment, but you cannot change now what is done, you can learn from it though and don't be sexual with another guy until you are sure that you are ready.
No you should not lie to another boyfriend, a relationship based on lies is never a good thing. You don't need to be ashamed of the truth, it has happened now you just need to learn to deal with it and move on. If someone asks you about it, you can simply tell them it is none of their business.
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