A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:What can a person do when they love someone who doesn't love them back? Specially when the one they love is just perfect. When they have tried for more than 3 years to get over it, to find one flaw in the one they love, to find anyone who would have the potential to be even half as important to them as the person they love, but with no luck.Now after all this time I look and I know that this is the only person I want. That he is kind and generous and smart and confident and handsome and no one can ever be like him. It's not his fault he doesn't find me interesting. What can I do? How can I move on?
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (4 December 2011):
 Mr. Perfect HAS a big ,unforgivable flaw. The biggest flaw of them all, the one that makes him loose more brownie points than all the others together :
he does not find you interesting.
You will think I am being witty , in fact I am totally serious.
I mean, this is a guy who basically does not " get " you, he is not capable to enter into your world and see how many fantastic things it offers. Maybe you get fired up about things or ideas that do not interest him at all ( whether it be a particular kind of music or type of food or political theory ) and while this may not be his fault, yet it is his big flaw : he does not relate to you, he does not " feel " you, he is too superficial/set in his ways /arrogant/something something to be curious about you and want to discover what you are all about.
Moving on is always difficult and it does not happen overnight. I think though that you may have delayed the process getting stuck in the frame of mind that you were not " good enough " to interest Mr.Perfect. Maybe it was exactly the opposite : he was not " good enough " for seeing the special things in you and being attracted . Seen from this perspective, moving on could be a little easier.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2011): i have to say, that just because you have strong feelings for someone doesnt mean you're compatible. it takes two to have a relationship. its ok to have a strong crush on someone who doesnt feel the same way, but dont chase the guy.find someone who will like you back and is willing to give you love as unconditional as you're willing to offer.to move on, you need to find someone who has all the qualities a relationship needs a person to have. you cant base it off of who you have feelings for if the person you have feelings for never did anything to earn those feelings.a good relationship takes time to be built, and if you can find it in you to give someone else a try, you can build feelings for them just as well.it is a good thing to start over with someone you dont already have feelings for, because then you can see them for who they really are before you take the steps towards gaining those feelings. you dont want to end up loving someone who will not love you in return
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 December 2011):
 First of you need to stop looking for a flaw because obviously to you there just is not any when it concerns him. Am pretty sure he has a few but you just cannot see them, as you are so much in love with the guy.
Instead of looking for faults you just need to look at the situation and tell yourself well he is not interested in you and he never will be. Don't let it get you down but it is the truth and you need to accept that and move forward with your life. He might look to you as mr perfect but to him you are not his girl. You need to write down on a piece of paper that he does not want you, and remember that. Yes it is hard and hurtful, but the sooner you start accepting it and moving forward the better.
You need to stop thinking about him in the way that you do and stop comparing other guys to him, let him go and move on. Good luck.
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