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male
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*okks
writes: I'm in a 3+year relationship with a wonderful girl, we're both 24 and live 10mins apart but every so often we have huge arguments that result in us asking each other, 'is it really worth it?'It all started around 2 1/2 years ago, not long after we left university (where we met), when our sex life slowed right down. I have quite a high sex drive and until this point i thought she did too, we were having lots of fun. From that point to now our sex became more sporadic and less frequent until now where it's once a month if i'm lucky.This has had a serious impact on me and believe me, i've had serious conversations with her in the past and even recently. It has gotten me nowhere. Since the sex decreased, me and my high sex-drive have turned elsewhere to get my fix - i don't mean cheating but porn, internet webcams... and she's fine with this, she even borrows my porn dvd's! Not only have i been turning to these things but i've slowly lost interest in her and other women have become increasingly noticeable.I hate feeling this way because i do love her but i just don't know how much any more. Our last argument came not long after i'd brought up the sex thing again and repeated that it's getting me right down. A few days later she called me up with all these problems in our relationship that she'd never mentioned before and i asked her (and myself ever since) the question 'is it worth it?'We don't want the same things, we both have busy careers, this happens every so often, nothing has changed in years, i think she's still really in love with me but i don't know if i feel the same... What in the heck does this mean and what should i do? Sorry for the long question.A
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2006): for a start if u dont love her stop stringing her along and end it. uve obviously tried telling her how you feel and its falling on deaf ears,and if ure lokking elswere ie porn sites it shows you that shes not enough for you so do her and you a favour and let her down gently.
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