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male
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anonymous
writes: I really dont know how i feel. me and my ex split up in january, there has been all the hate, nearly getting back together, thing. We were each others first love, we were engaged, lived together for 3 years, 1 and half years in our own place, and we were happy for most of it, obviously we had arguements, and when we split up, it just kind of happened, we had had a break for 2 weeks then when we got back together everything was fine for a few days then it just ended. Since we split up i have always wanted her back, i have tired fighting for her etc and i know there were times when we would of got back together, but we were both scared of it.a couple of months ago i thought i cant put myself through the hurt anymore and i said i wanted her to leave me alone, but it hurts even more not having her in my life, the last week or so we have been talking again, we both want to be friends because i know we can become great friends but im sure my feelings for her will always creep up, but i dont want to spoil our friendship because we havent spoke like we have been doing for so long, it was kind of fun, flirty talking we both had like with someone you have just met at bar, and i just dont know what to do, i asked her to tell me we wont be getting back together a few months ago which she told me, and we have both said when we think about the other person with someone else it kills us and makes us feel sick, but she said she will always love me, alot has happened between us and that may prove to be the reason we wont get back together, but i just want to be there for her, she will always be my first love and there will always be that spark between us, i just dont want to lose her altogether, and she doesnt want to lose me altogether, what should i do? please help, i cant keep going round in circles
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