A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Alrighty.. sorry about the long message!!Well im 19 and I find myself quite crazy about a 38yr old! we work together and for the first year of working together we never actually knew eachothers age!! only recently have we found out how old eachother actually are and are both a bit shocked as I look older and he looks alot younger and we have alot in common! I know he feels the same about me as he has spoke to my friend at work about it! We caught up outside of work as friends and had the most wonderful day... never a awkward silence or short of something to say and absolutly ddnt even notice an age gap at all.. it was probally one of the best dates I had been on!! I thought I'd use this as a oppuortunity to see if he seemed to have any 'sleazy' intentions like often older men do but He didnt try anything and although we stayed up late watching movies and drinking wine he didnt even try for a hug and was very gentlemanly!! I suppose I just want some advice and opinions of whether I should progress this into something more becuase I feel its completely up to me as he is being very respectful and doesnt want to rush into anything incase I feel I am not ready. Does anyone have any advice or past experiances they can share??
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, floraltemptaions  +, writes (23 August 2007):
Well... I agree with both the previous aunts. It is something you do have to talk about if you two were to become more serious, as you don't notice the age just in your conversations, but at some point it will come up as a life issue. My fiancee and I are 11yrs apart... I'm 25 and hes 36.... but have been together since I was 19 & he 30. He looks younger, and I never noticed the age difference.. we got along wonderfully, but he always felt like he was holding me back from enjoying my youth. The other thing I do sometimes think about is being alone when we get old.... it makes me sad to think that he will be gone before me... but then, you can never think of the "what if's", as any of us could die tommorrw.... so... I guess, I say enjoy, have fun together, but do give it some thought when you are thinking about getting serious.
Best of luck!
A
female
reader, skyebabe  +, writes (23 August 2007):
 it doesent matter about the age if you love someone then you just cant help that no matter wot anyone says its your life at the end off the day at least you are over 16 and you do feel real about this email me if u wanna talk xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2007): you asked this question already so you obviously have reservations about this age gap. Maybe you should date a guy in his 20's instead & you wouldn't be so worried. Of course he's going to be nice to you, he has a chance to get a girl 1/2 his age!! Don't be his trophy. Why can't he find a woman his own age? If a woman were 38 & dating a 19 year old it would be a big to do..but it's no big deal b/c it's a younger woman. There was a show on Dr. Phil the other day about a 20 y/o guy dating a 34 y/o woman & it was a huge deal...I don't understand why the steroetype.
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A
female
reader, happytochat +, writes (23 August 2007):
You may not realise the age gap now but soon enough or later you may. Although hes older, and it doesnt stop you two frm getting alng so well, it may cause other issues if you guys were to become serious. For example, at his age he more then liekly might be at the stage of his life wanting to be married sometime soon, where as you are veyr young and arent at that stage yet. He may want kids soon beforeh e gets too old to look after them or he may not even want any if he already has soem. These are all issues you should consider before taking things further, because if you dont then you will be dealing with them latr and you may find then are going to cause an end to your relationship.
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (23 August 2007):
 Hey you are an adult, so if it feels right for you then i would say go for it.
Take care.xx.
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