A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am unsure what to do in regards to my relationship with my boyfriend. We have been together for almost 2 years, yet it's more like we are roommates now instead of lovers. We haven't had sex in months, partially because I have been off the pill for the past month due to insurance issues. Not only that, we are hardly intimate anymore. Conversation has turned into what we did today and all about his newest gaming fad. Not only that, there are times where he becomes very critical of me and starts lecturing me very negatively. I may not be the best at housework, but at least I do it! He does't do anything unless I ask him, and even then he puts it off. We both love each other very much, but it's looking like our relationship isn't going well. I would like to save breaking up as a last resort, so really I ould just some advice on how to handle this if there is any hope left.Thank you so much for helping.-Amanda
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female
reader, Sunystar1 +, writes (7 October 2010):
 You 2 are co-existing. I've been there with my husband, came out of it and go right back there. From my own experience, I would as you to ask some ?s of the relatonship. Is there something of benefit for either one of you to drag the relationship on? Like bills easier 2 pay 2gether than alone, car, food, like material issues. So many people get caught up in bad love because there is something of benefit there. An easier way to life. If not, maybe he is just dealing with some internal depression and issues. When people become critical, its not good. It's a door better left closed in relationships. I got caught up in the critical spirit towards my spouse but it was because he wsan't doing anything right...he is/was very selfish and always showed unappreciation as I contributed much more in all areas. He became critical of me to overshadow his own lacking and faults. I would write a letter with questions to him about what he desires from the 2 of u, his hopes for the future, his issues good and bad with the present and see if that helps. Be careful honey, broken hearts from neglect are worse than broken hearts from ending a failed relationship. Don't let yourself settle in love, keep looking for the one that truly completes you. Good luck and best wishes.
A
female
reader, LLindy87 +, writes (7 October 2010):
 Have you tried bringing this up with him? communication is the best resort to regaining your relationship with him.
if that doesn't work...its going to be very hard to do anything about it.
If you don't want to talk to him directly about it you could try making the first move, although its hard if you're off the pill to consider this one.
In my town there is a place called west suburban teen clinic that gives out free birth control through the government until a person is 25 if they can't afford it. I wonder if you live anywhere close to a facility like that? If you live in Minnesota, the place I'm talking about is in Excelsior, MN. However, I highly doubt you live in this state...the odds are slim.
But I would look into places like that, makes life easier :).
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