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male
,
anonymous
writes: I have a friend, we met at work, after a while we got close, he would hold my hand, tickle me because he liked how i laughed, hug me from behind, he would pull me onto his lap, embrace me, even once i felt him hard behind me. he's got a girlfriend with two kids, he once told me that if those kids weren't there, he'd leave her. He is very comfortable around me. is this guy gay?
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell, here is what happened since I posted this questions, he's tried to kiss me, missed and kissed my cheek instead, lol, I dunno folks, this is crazy.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2006): Why would he be gay? He clearly fancies you BIG TIME. Watch out.
Spice
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2006): maybe or maybe not ...talk to him about his feelings for you, listen to what he says.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2006): Buddy you should checjk if you are not gay why would you let him put you on his lap and tickle you and if you are gay whats the problem
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (28 September 2006):
 I'm curious...are you gay?
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A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (28 September 2006):
 If I was in your shoes I would just have to ask and find out once and for all, I couldn't have what feels like something more just hanging there not knowing.
I would arrange to meet up with him and see how he is around you, talk about your friendship and whats been going on since you left etc and then more on to things like your glad you both kept in contact after you went, then just bring it up casually.
If your true friends then mentioning this won't spoil anything you already have with each other.
Good luck :o)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPart two of this I suppose, is other factors to consider. I was very nice to him, kind, helped him with problems he had. Threw him a birthday bash, and he hugged me and said thanks for the best night of his life. He said that he never met anyone like me, I had to leave the work environment because of a better opportunity, when I informed him of this he said and I quote " You can't leave, I need you in my life". I asked him, "what do you want to do?" he didn't know. We had a long talk that day, I wasn't moving out of city or anything. He still didn't like that fact I was leaving because he thought he would never see or hear from me again. We both agreed to visit each other. After I left that job another person told me that he had changed after I left, his attitude, he would not take good care of himself. Recently we have been talking more, but it seems like too much of an effort... I know maybe thats not a good thing to say about someone I considered my best friend. I just need what we are in defined before I can continue. I really do miss his company alot, hes a good guy.
Did I cause these feelings? How do you start up a conversation about what we want out of the friendship?
Is it still called a friendship when it comes with all the conditions? Is it worth it?
Put yourself in my shoes for a moment before you answer.
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A
male
reader, Dr. Reality Check  +, writes (25 September 2006):
 Just re-read what you've written, and I am sure you will realise, as most of the rest of us are, that yes he's gay....and has a major crush on you.
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A
female
reader, Toria +, writes (25 September 2006):
Well it sounds like he has some sort of attraction towards you, whether he will or wants to actually do anything about that is another thing.
You don't want to get yourself stuck in this situation not only because you work together, your friends and he is married you need to either try to show that you don't want this behaviour anymore or tell him you don't before it goes too far.
Good luck :o)
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