A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Hello! My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 yrs and have 2 children. He recently has bought a new phone (his old one was an old phone he had for a yr, but it was an older type phone, with the mobile browser that charges you for every minute you are on type thing) He gave his old phone to our 2.5 yr old to play with and yesterday she brought the phone to me because she got stuck on a page, it was his album, now he never uses the cam on his phone nor can he receive picture messages and this phone, but in the album was 3 pictures, first was at his friends birthday, which I was there, second picture was a snapshot he took of a recipe and the third was a penis going in to a vagina! I asked him (he was in kitchen) what is this picture? He came over and looked and said "oh my god, I completely forgot about that, it is porn...I am so embarrassed!" and he deleted the picture.. I didn't get a good look at the pic, but since seeing that so much has been running through my mind..The pic looked like a phone pic of someone taking a pic of their penis going in to someones vagina...And I really wish I had gotten a better look at the pic.. I know he looks at porn, but he always does on his laptop, why would he pay to go on the mobile browser on his phone and pay to download this pic to his phone? (yes his phone was the type that he could really only look back at old texts etc unless you want to be charged to use the shitty browser they had)I want to believe him that it is porn, but I keep thinking what if he cheated and he took that pic? I didn't think he was the type to cheat, but the fact he would use his phone to download and pay for a shitty image doesn't make sense to me. I am not sure what to say or do? Any advice on how to bring the topic back up? I know he was embarrassed already, I don't care if it is porn, but what if it was him in the picture? Any advice is appreciated! Thank you
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2012): Original poster here again, Thanks for all the advice so far! As for the marriage comment, it isn't something he believes in and he told me from day 1 and I am ok with that, I also don't think he took the pic of someone else having sex, I thought it was either him having sex with someone (the pic is of a penis going in to vagina) or he got it off the internet, but if it was taken with his phone, I would think it was him, not him taking the pic of someone else. I did bring the topic up yesterday, I didn't want to start an argument, so let him know that off the bat. I just asked why the pic and how the pic got on his phone, he told me he took a pic off his computer (used his phone camera to get screen shot of computer pic) which I do believe, he hasn't lied to me in 4 yrs, so will give him benefit of the doubt for now. Thanks again :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2012): If it was downloaded off the internet, would/should it be in a different folder than pics taken with the phone? Or have a different type of default file name? I suppose it's too late to know now.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2012): There's a 3rd possibility: it could be porn that he downloaded to his computer & uploaded to his phone. Ask him how it got on his phone.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2012): Does this guy want to marry you?? 4 years together with two kids?? IMHO. He took a pic. of himself with another girl & forgot to delete it. Why would he take a pic. of some other couple having sex? I think you should give yourself a reality check and don't be blinded by this guy... Men are dirty dogs...
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (1 January 2012):
 The picture may have been taken with his phone, or downloaded.
If it was taken with his own phone, then I wouldn't think it was a picture of somebody else.
If it was downloaded, then that sounds odd but not impossible.
I would consider this a red flag.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2012): Original poster,
Forgot to add, he does not travel or stay away from home. In the past yr he hasn't gone away once (other than boys poker nights at his best friends) I went to visit fam across country in Jan 2011 for a month, other than that he is usually at work or home.. So not like he was not near a computer or Internet where he couldn't look at pics for free.
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