A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey.i am a christian girl,who has everything she wishes for ...that is a lie ,i love a muslim guy(love him more than i ever loved anyone)he is my boyfreind but people just want me to leave him (i have 19 boys chasing after me sendin me cards they r christian)freinds who met my boyfreind say he is great, freinds who just know he is muslim try to make me meet new guys just to leave him, i live in a place where no mix of religion can't be done.because they make u feel so bad about it as if you are killin someone ,but in fact i am ,i am killin my boy who i love ,that is the last thing i wanna do ,but he is soo complicates we always fight but he knows i love him and he loves me ,what should i do?if i stay with him maybe we won't end up together !and end up hurtin him because he isn't in my religion plz help!
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni can't believe i posted this question 4 years ago!
most members have deactivated their accounts,and others might not even be intrested in what happened next,haha..
the thing is,people said i'll get over it and it's just young love and lust!..i still feel the same way about him,even though we're not together,and he's probably married and have some kids,but this post brings back so many memories,for that was the only time i truley loved someone
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionlife without him iswnt even worth living im still in love with this guy i know its stupid... but.. i cant let go:S
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (12 October 2008):
 Dear poster, you're right in saying that moving on is never that simple. But it can be done, specially when the other person just doesn't want to be with you.
I understand your pain. I can only advise you to move on. I have been where you're now, and I know how it is. I can also tell you that here I am, alive and kicking.
Take much care.
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionit has been 1 year,since this post,and i'd love to tell you what happened even when i know when no one will be still interested in such an old post..
he is getting married to another girl:(,and i still love him,i told him how i felt,but he said that we could never be together,and i know he is right!but it was a lot for me to take..and what really hurts is seeing the man you love getting married to another girl.who he loves!she would never love him like i ever did!never!but she has changed every thing about him!she has done what i've always dreamt of doing to him!....
seeing him with another woman kills me just because i wasn't able to do the same things...she's muslim too..made him get closer to god:(my dream was getting him closer to god!
now i understood that it's over between us but the pain of never seeing him again kills me!
so now im here to give every heart breaker an advice..when u break someone's heart it hurts a 100000 times more than actually hurting him..
i'm sorry for talking too much..bas im heartbroken and everyone says that i will get over him but what they really don't know that it's never that simple!
i wanna thank everyone who has tried to help!love you guys!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 January 2008): my suggest is to be with him as long as u love it will be ur willing get him and leave other thing
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey. i really wish you good luck, and i hope you will be happy with him,and things would turnd out to be great, not like what happened to me, but from my experience i don't regret meeting him, and loving him, because i have learned so much. and i think that yu can do it if you love each other. and for the boy i love, well he has traveled so far away from me, so i know nothing about him and that is what is killing me. hope i took the right choice ,bye.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2007): hey there..i know what u feel dear, im going thru the same kinda confusion right now. my bf is muslim and im chritian, i see myself as a strong believer. both of us love each other very much but his only reason for having second thoughts about turning is his mother that he worries about, so do i coz we get along very nice..and i love his mom too. but like all the others say its gona be difficult. im sorry to hear you have broken up, i cant think what will happen to me if anything like that should happen with me and my boyfriend..but be strong love... reallove does conquer all..mwah
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reader, Danielepew +, writes (14 November 2007):
Well, dear, you did your best, while he didn't want to go his half of the way. At least you tried. Now, move on and always be happy.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey again for anyone who would wanna know what happened next, i talked to him and he was so sad and mad at the same time because he told me at first that : if our religion would be a problem around the way, i don't wanna be with you.
he said that he loves me and he would give up everything for me, but it wasn't hepful at all.
anyways it has been about 2 weeks after our breakup, it is really hard for both of us. but maybe it turned out to the best.
i wanna thank you all for taking time out of your lives and look at my problem.
for me religion isn't that big of a topic, i love my religion so much but it shouldn't be a reason for why do people don't get along.
bye.
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionmy frist step was talking to my mother about my situation...................... and so i did.
she said that she doesn't have a problem with his religion and that maybe he is better then a million other boys but she still thinks i have to take a lot of care and people around me might try to coe in between and if i really love him i should not let that happen .. anyways she said that i have to concentrate on my studies ...and she has no problem with him as long as he respects me and keeps me happy....thanks everyone ... i have many steps to pass hope i do well ... thanks for taking time to anwser love you all bye...
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reader, Asexy  +, writes (24 October 2007):
 Assuming that your religion is important to both of you, and that you'll both want to pass that religion on to any children you may have, I'm afraid that you two probably won't make it. I'm very sorry.
If one of you can give up your religion, then you can stay together. But unless you want your children raised in both religions (which can be done but is very confusing) you will have troubles.
I think you and your boyfriend need to have a very frank talk about your religious beliefs. Perhaps you can compromise; I have a friend who is a Presbyterian minister and her husband is an Atheist, so I know it can happen. But you have to work VERY hard and be very supportive of the other person. (BTW, my friends don't have children, so they didn't have to argue about that one.)
Good luck hon.
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reader, Danielepew +, writes (24 October 2007):
Perhaps a point that everyone is missing is that the poster lives in Lebanon, where religion is taken a lot more seriously than in the West, and where religious boundaries mean a hell of a lot more than here. Just remember what has been happening in Lebanon in the last quarter of a century.
I think you are doing the right thing. Talk to him and see if you can work something out. Ultimately, no religion condemns true love, and there should be a way for religious people to be more forgiving of someone who doesn't belong to their own faith.
I would alert you, though, that working the relationship out will be very difficult, for your age, your different backgrounds, and considering where you live. Be strong if something goes wrong.
Take much care and keep us updated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey everyone well i hope i will do the right thing:( but i love him so much ...breaking up with him would be so hard for me ..so i decided to talk to him and let him know what i feel and tell him that i love my chirstianity hope he respects it anyways hope it is the right thing to do thanks for your help will let u know how things turn out ..............thanks
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): This depends on how you adhere to your religion. If you find that your religion is absolute, then for you to continue this relationship with him, it can get really difficult, especially if you try to convert him. However, if you find that you are more philosophically and spiritually in-tuned with your religion rather than it being an absolute law or truth and justice, then it's possible this can work out.
I have a male friend who is Muslim, and he does his prayers every day, but he also has a wife who isn't Muslim and is agnostic. I have never asked them how they broke through any possibly initial hurdles, but they seem to enjoy a rather fulfilling life. They travel together, often taking what they call "Honeymoons".
In another example, my friend's parents are of different religions. The dad is Christian and the mom is Buddhist. Their families didn't like that, and in fact, the dad's mom actually thought less and condemned the Buddhist. To say the least, the dad and the mom 'escaped' from the clutches of their religious families and have been married for nearly 30 years since, riding across Canada and to the states on their motorcycle, enjoying retirement together.
Like I said, it's how you adhere to your religion.
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reader, desirewhitefire  +, writes (24 October 2007):
 Get away, fast. The fact that you always argue should be a big enough hint. Muslim men are a lot different than Christians. Go watch that movie, "Not Without My Daughter", with Sally Field in it. That should give a wake up call into what you have to look forward to, should you stay with him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): Well, unfortunately, much as you may love him, and he you, the sad truth is that a romantic relationship between a Christian and a Muslim is very, very difficult.
If you continue, you will come to experience a lot of pressure on you, and expectation from his family, to convert to Islam. Would you be prepared to do that and perhaps go against your own convictions in so doing, adopt a very different way of life, maybe alienate your family and friends?
Christianity is good, so is Islam, but as I said, a romantic or marriage mix is fraught with problems, no matter how much you both think you can cope. You are still pretty young, both of you, and it does take a great deal of maturity to take on such a relationship as this, you know.
However, you are already discovering how difficult this can be, you say he complicates things and you find yourselves fighting.
Probably better to end it now, before one or the other of you gets hurt, emotionally.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): Well, personaly, I don't let religon get in the way of things (esp. love). I don't think there's anything in the bible about how you shouldn't love someone because he is diffrent. In fact, God is all about love and peace and happiness. If I were you, I would stay with him. If you really really love him, than I think you should. But, if you're still confused, it really boils down to your choice. On one hand you have a boy who you love (and hopefully loves you back), and on the other you have your friends and family (who haven't met him) and the diffrence in your religon.
Again, what I would do, is have all your friends and family meet him, and if you really feel that bad about it, pray to god about it. That you really love him and that you hope the fact that his religon is diffrent from yours won't hurt anyone.
take care
:)
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2007): From personal experience if you don't have the same religious beliefs it will never work out if u are the christian u say u are. You can still love him, but you can't be with him. I didn't want to believe it either, but our beliefs eventually tore my fiance and I apart because what you believe in is reflected in your everyday lifestyle. Do you really want to raise kids in such a confusion?
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