A
female
age
51-59,
*ayna
writes:I have been dating a man for 9 months. He is very connected to my spirit. We are very compatible. We are so much alike. He has said he loves me. I love him too. Everything is perfect when we are together, we have such a great time...it's just that he sometimes doesn't call me for several days...like 10 days. I have just recently started calling him or texting him and he calls sometimes. Most recently, we had a wonderful evening together...he called the next day.... and said that i am dear to his heart. We talked about seeing each other on the weekend. It is now the next weekend ...no call. I am a very together woman and normally I wouldn't put up with this, but there is something special about him. I want to end it because the unpredictibility is making me crazy.What do I do? I really want a him to be worthy of this relationship.
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female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (3 May 2008):
 It doesn't sound as if he respects you enough to let you know where he stands except to say you are dear to his heart. It is entirely possible that he is not emotionally available at this time. If that is the case, you are best to cut your losses and find someone who can be in a relationship. If you've been dating for 9 months "the talk about where this is going" should maybe be had. He may tell you that he's not ready to commit but that is something you need to hear so that you can make your decision regarding whether or not to move on.
Your last statement "I want him to be worthy of this relationship" kind of says it all. He is not worthy and his actions are speaking louder than his words. He wants you on his terms and you don't get to decide. He can take you or leave you, leaving you completely beside yourself with "what is going on here."
It is possible he has no idea this bothers you. If you say you are a put together woman perhaps he concludes that you're busy with your life and you've no concern about what he is or isn't doing to stay in touch. There is a rule of three though and if he says he'll call you and doesn't do so when he says then he's broken a "promise." If he does this or has done this, more than three times you should think twice about what you probably don't have.
I hope things work out better for you than they did for me in a similar situation.
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