A
female
age
36-40,
*ambiee33
writes:My fiance has cheated on me. He has gone on chatlines and has gotten girls numbers. He says he loves me and that was the past and cant understand why i have trouble trusting him. We fight more now and he says he was immature back then but back then has only been 4 months. Am i wrong to not trust him? He says im so beautiful and our love is deeper then that and what he did meant nothing. Should i try and move on? Am i over reacting? He was the first person i had ever fully trusted and that included my family. I love him and weve been to gether a long time but is it true once a cheater always a cheater?
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female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (20 October 2010):
 I'm sorry to sound so pessimistic yet, I don't quite feel he's trustworthy. He doesn't seem very sorry. Especially reading that comment he made about being "immature back then" when he was talking about a time period of 4 months. It sounds like he's making excuses and trying to sweet-talk you into believing in him. He can't "understand" why you're having trouble trusting him? Well, would he have trusted you so easily if you had been the one cheating? I can't/won't tell you what to do. However, you can't love and be happy with someone you do not and cannot trust. And he needs to EARN back the trust you lost in him. If he doesn't "understand" that, he's making light of your feelings-not a good sign. I'd hold off on the marriage until I was sure about this man. Take some time to think and reflect about this alone. Be very honest with yourself. Best of luck.
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