A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Dear CupidMy relationship with my bf was perfect when i was staying in different city (away from him) for work. I came back 4 months back and thats when all the troubles started.1. He wont even talk to me for days, we stay together but no talking, he'll be busy with his friends and come home late and go to work early2. Never does anything to help me house chores3. Never will be there when i am sick or i need some help around the house4. Will be there 24/7 if he needs money from me to pay his morgage. The house we stay is in his name, he bought just before he met me5. Will never buy anything for me for christmas or bday, but expects expensive gifts from me.6. Never supposed to call him at work, not ever call him more than once a day. And he might even pick up the call if im luckyDid i happen to mention, he was my best friend before we started dating. I dont even feel he is even my friend anymore.Now the current situation is, im kind of broke, i gave my money for his morgage, and he says he is bored with me and the im most boring person he ever met and he cant stay with anyone longer than a year, we were together for 3 yrs. And he asked me to move out in 2 days and left.I feel like im the most stupidest person in the world for trusting him and feel so numb and dumb, i am kind of introvert, i dont have much friends. What should i do now. I know i have to move on, how could i even trust anyone anymore, i feel alone, actually im alone. My parents were abusive and we are not in talking terms now.Please help me
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Got Issues  +, writes (4 May 2013):
 You've found out the hard way that people aren't always who you think they are. He was good to you when you were just friends, "perfect" when you were together but apart, and now that you're together properly (which is what most couples aspire to be sooner or later) he has become cold and cruel and the whole thing has fallen apart. It must be devastating for you but in time you will be thankful that you got away from him and that you weren't married and didn't own the house together. That would have made this situation a lot more complicated.I don't think there is anything to salvage with this guy. He doesn't want to be with you, and even if he apologised for the things he said to you and told you he didn't mean it, he would still have said it. The best thing for you to do is get out of there as quickly as you can. You say you don't have a lot of friends but do you have anyone, a friend or relative, that you could stay with for a short time while you get yourself together and find a place to live? Or check out house-share websites, I don't know where you would look in the U.S. but I've always found rooms online and there are people who are looking for a roommate for just a month or two. This could be a solution while you look for something more permanent. Don't blame yourself for the way things have gone. He sounds like a loser, and a mean one at that. It's hard when someone who was once a friend, someone who cared about you and made you feel good, seems to change completely because you miss that person and it's hard to understand how someone can change like that, but but this is who he is. Focus your energy on your recovery rather than his cruelty. You need to spend time picking up the pieces and making your life better for yourself. The most important thing is getting out of the house and finding a place to stay. When you are settled, try to get involved in things, meet people and make new friends. Situations like this are when you see how important it is to have a network of friends. Good luck.
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