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female
,
anonymous
writes: I have been friends with this guy for about six months and we have grown close in a platonic way. I have loved him from the first time me we met but he had a girlfriend so I had settled into just being friends.Now he is contemplating breaking up with his girlfriend for various reasons, none assosiated with me. He keeps asking my advice and I feel any I give is biased.How do I handle this? Also now in the past week he has become more flirtous with me. If he does indeed break up with his girlfriend what do I do? Do I advance or could this ruin our friendship ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2006): :sigh:sadly to say, it could ruin a great friendhship, because if it doesn't work out--you might not be able to go back to your flirty ways. don't go straight to him after he breaks up with his girlfriend, because even after the break-up he could have feelings for her, you know? and if he asks you out right after the break-up, tell him you think YOU'RE not ready--and neither is he (explain in detail why you tihnk that)because he could be asking you out, because he got bored of his girlfriend, and even though you may think you're the best of friends and he told you every reason for breaking up with his girl, you must remember--you're not one of the guys. wait it out, take the friendhship on for as long as possible, you'll become closer and he'll appreciate you more. six months isn't that long...stya friends and get even closer!
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female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx  +, writes (20 August 2006):
 Firstly, although it may be hard, you must separate yourself from his splitting up with his girlfriend. If he looks back and thinks your biased advice made him split up with her and he later decides it was a bad idea, he will resent you. So give him good and honest advice about what to do. The fact that he's questioning the relationship means he's probably made up his mind already anyway.
As for you two getting together, maybe it would be best to leave it a while. Let him come to you, as he has just come out of a relationship. Maybe he'll want to play the field a bit or have some time on his own. Whatever happens, if you want him, tell him how you feel and let him tell you how he feels about you.
As for losing him as a friend, yes, this could happen if you are partners for a while then split. You've just got to ask yourself whether or not this is worth a try? If it is, go for it but if he is too good a friend, don't bother. Good luck
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