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The girl I like is with another guy, should I accept that I'm second best or continue to persue her?

Tagged as: Online dating, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (28 June 2009) 3 Answers - (Newest, 28 June 2009)
A male United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

There's a girl that I like. We met over the internet, and have been chatting for the past 2 months. We get on really well and have a lot of common interests. We even arranged to go on a date earlier in the month, but the plan fell through. Now it turns out that there's another guy that she likes. She's met him a few times and is interested in continuing to see him.

She wants our friendship to continue, but what do you think I should do? I'm really gutted that she's chosen him over me, but that's the way it goes and I must accept that. Truth be told a part of me would like to pursue a relationship with her, but I refuse to be a silver medal. Do you think I should make an effort to keep our friendship up?

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A female reader, QuirkLady United States +, writes (28 June 2009):

QuirkLady agony auntKeep in touch with her but still move on with your life. After all, she could get close with this guy and end up dating for a few years...you want to wait around for all that? Plus you haven't met in person, and meeting up physically might show that you're really not attracted to each other after all.

Keep on dating and meeting people. She's not the only woman out there.

Good luck.

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A female reader, jadeybabe116 Canada +, writes (28 June 2009):

It's unfortunate that you're hurting because of this girl, but the reality is that you need to move on. You've only been chatting two months, and you've never met in person. It sounds like you've got this girl on a pedestal, and that's not a healthy start to any relationship - cyber or otherwise. If she's got another guy interest, she doesn't feel the same way for you that you do for her. Move on with your life, meet a new girl (one that isn't on the internet, perhaps) and good luck!

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A male reader, citic101 France +, writes (28 June 2009):

citic101 agony auntMake the effort to keep your friendship you never know she might change her mind and pick you a few weeks later. But if you have pushed her away there will not be any chance.

Its nice to have friends and just think she will be telling all her friends what a nice guy you are and the more she does that she is going to think "yes he is , might just take him for myself " ?

Good luck

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