A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone. So, here is my situation. For a very long time (a year now) my life has been a rollercoaster. I was unlucky enough to be drawn into a twisted love triangle between two best friends. I fell in love with the one and the other one, his friend did his best to steal me away using lies and manipulation (he almost succeeded) His excuse was that he fell for me first and my now ex was not treating me right. Now that I am reflecting upon it it looks like I was just the trophy in a battle that had to do with deep rooted competition issues between them which hurts even more. Still, I feel it is still tearing me apart. I am trying my best to stay away from both suitors, even re arranging my entire life so that I minimize the chances of running into them but it is not always possible as we share a lot of friends and we move in the same circles so seeing each other is inevitable and my life is a series of provocations, fights and gossip. I can hardly breathe. Last night I ran into my former lover. We had a brief but very meaningful and intense conversation and then I left in a hurry. I am still very much in love with him, so much it hurts but everything is destroyed. The two former best friends aren't even talking and I feel I am to blame somehow. I feel overwhelmed by all crazy things that happened. I tried everything in my power to forget, I took a long holiday away from it all, tried to consider dating other people but no one even compares, deleted all accounts and changed my number but nothing helps. This is not going away and it is so unhealthy it is killing me. The entire situation exploded this November and it is on going drama all the way (mostly instigated by my ex lover's best friend), complete with scream fests, showing up at my doorstep drunk, telling common friends fibs. I just want to be happy. Can anyone help???
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best friend, drunk, fell in love, his ex, my ex, want to be happy Reply to this Question
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male
reader, epicureansage  +, writes (21 February 2011):
Hello again - I suggest you cut this game-player out of your life. And if you still have feelings for the ex, consider talking to him. Explain what his "friend" is up to. He sounds like weasel...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 February 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSorry, I can see the confusion, no I actually never strayed, it was he other way around. During my absence on a field project my lover cheated or at least it really appeared to be the case and I got the gory details from his so called "friend" which led to us breaking up, he even brought the other woman to me so she can give me the details herself, it was awful. he then moved on consoled and pursued me and I almost fell for it but it never went further than this, we never slept together or anything. He went ballistic when I admitted to still being in love with his friend (which is why I couldn't sleep with him)and been obsessing ever since. Later a lot of ugly details came up (I didn't want this to be a long post). I now know for a fact that he's been lying to my boyfriend about me about various things so I am not sure of what was eventually true and what wasn't (and it is not like my ex will admit to the truth readily now that he has an alibi)it is all very confusing, I know.. sigh
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A
male
reader, epicureansage +, writes (20 February 2011):
You are sketchy on the details - did you stray with your ex's friend? IF so, I don't get the "passive victim" stuff on your part. If I'm mistaken, pls clarify what actually happened...
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