A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have strong feelings for a married woman. I am single with two grown children and have been divorced for ten years. I have recently ended a long term relationship. This woman and I work together. She is my client. She has two young children. We get along so well. We laugh together, share the same sense of humour and have become good friends. I sense she is not happy with her husband. She does not want to talk about him very much. She does things separately from him a lot. She is so beautiful on the inside and out and an amazing mom. I find myself falling harder for her every day. All I have to do is look into her eyes and I am lost in her amazing beauty and personality. She is the total package. I have never thought about getting married again until she came into my life.It is difficult trying to keep the relationship strictly professional because of the attraction and friendship we both share. I am very sure she feels the same way but cannot act on it because she is married. I do not want to interfere in her marriage because I am a good guy and I don't believe in moving in on married women so I am really torn. But I feel like she is the one for me. And I am finding it harder to hide it and harder to just keep a professional distance. I just want to get closer and closer to her. I feel like we both fell in love with each other without ever expecting it.What should I do? Should I tell her how I am feeling? Should I keep loving her from afar? Should I ask her if her marriage is good? I am not sure how to proceed. I don't know how much longer we can go this way. Maybe she is waiting to see if I will make a move? Tough situation. I know that we are meant for each other. We have both developed a very good friendship for a long time BEFORE there was ever any attraction. The attraction just seemed to have blossomed within the last few months.How do I know she is married to the wrong person? Maybe she is no longer happy with him. Otherwise she would not be so emotionally connected to me or allow herself to become this close. I can tell she really feels for me and shares the attraction and feelings.Anybody out there who can help me and give me advice on what to do????? Thanks!
View related questions:
divorce, fell in love, married woman Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2012): Continue being the good guy, honest and one of integrity. Start cutting down time with her.I say even help her remain faithful to her vows and promises of her marriage.I say this because she needs to be the strong, smart woman that you claim her to be and make a choice if she wants to remain married or not and THEN think of having a relationship with you.If she asks why you seemed to have cooled off or have become distant, tell her out right. I am not one to encourage unfaithfulness from a married woman, even if its business lunches.http://foreverfamilies.byu.edu/Article.aspx?a=47Because if she can't be accountable, responsible, and honest about her marriage, her attraction and live honourably- how would she be with you, should she ever leave her marriage?Be Wise.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (3 January 2012):
 She's a CLIENT of your's??????? What are the protocols in your business, about consorting with CLIENTS??????
I suggest you absorb my (above) then see if you REALLY want to learn the details which you seek.....
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2012): If she is married with two young children it is unlikely that she is looking to jump ship just yet. She may not be happy, but she may be in a stable situation and that can be important as a mother. She may find your attentions enjoyable, giving a lift to her day. Everyone loves to feel attractive and desired. But whether she would want to take it further is debatable. You could make your feelings known, risking a knock back. I sense you need to try to move things on because it is getting to you. So if you are prepared for rejection, gently tell her that your feelings for her are strong and see where it goes.
...............................
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (3 January 2012):
 Well if you truly believe that she feels the same and you are sure that you are not deluding yourself in to thinking she does well then I think the only thing that you can do is talk to her. Tell her how you feel but you need to make it clear to her that you will not start an affair with her while she is still married and you need to stick to this promise. I am not sure what her marriage is like or if she is happy or not. But if you want to tell her how you feel then carry on, but you need to also be prepared for rejection as lots of people take marriage very seriously and she might not be ready to think about anything else. Just as long as you keep to your promise that you will not do anything while she is still married then there is no harm in letting her know that there are other options out there for her. It will also help you deal with this if you are just honest. Good luck.
...............................
|
