A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a chance to visit my ex-bf who's now living in my home country during my family visit next month, and I wonder if it's a good idea.I'm an Asian girl and he's white. Both of us used to live here in the UK, he's working and I'm studying. We met online and were happily in an exclusive relationship for 7 months, then he got a job offer in Asia and eventually accepted it. I'll finish my study after 2 years and am very likely to work in that city, too. He moved there and was distracted by all the Asian women around him soon. He told me he was tempted, and felt lonely. So I visited him 1.5 months later, showed him around (I used to study in that city) etc. I found that he posted online to know new girls, although I don't think he actually met any at that time. After I came back, I realized that he's in a big struggle to stay monogomous, and I didn't want a "forced" relationship like that, so we decided to "take a step back" and still be dating, not exclusively though.But nothing really changed after this, except I went out with a few people, nothing serious. We still skype almost everyday (normally 30min-1hr, sometimes 2-3hrs). This Christmas we're exchanging gift, I've sent a parcel to his mom's house where he's visiting with handmade gifts to him and his sister (who I met in the UK before).He also called one day after I told him my supervisor was very unhappy with my work, he's so guilty and very sincerely apologized for his behavior after he moved to Asia as he believed he affected my study. He said he'd always be there for me, including when I need him to proofread my 100,000 words thesis (lol). When I visited him, he also told me his very dark childhood stories which he never told other people.We still flirt quite a bit and very occasionally when he's horny, he'd musterbate when we're chatting on skype or he'd ask me if he could have a quick peek of my boobs so he could musterbate after the chat. Sometimes I'd let him, sometimes I'd say "this is not sex chat!" and we'd talk about other things then. Basically I feel very respected.Next month I'm visiting my family in Asia and I'm flying back to the UK from his city. I can stay there up to 9 days and I've asked if I can stay in his place with no sex involved, and he said no problem, and e joked "Just let me musterbate next to you and that's it!" I haven't decided if it's a good idea to visit or have sex with him (I still feel attracted to him physically), I know everything will be the same no matter what I choose.Some opinions please?
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female
reader, HIE9da  +, writes (21 December 2010):
 If you guys are wit each other,theres no prob,i mean u cant be strangers to each other its not like u dont one another..maybe something good will come out of that visit,who really knows!
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