A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i caught my boyfriend cheating on me . He apologized in the sweetest ways , flowers, cards , sending my favorite movies, phone calls, messages , voicemalls constenly. I love him alot and without him i fell horible, but i dont know if i should trust him. Its his second time . any advice ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2009): I am really glad. You're welcome back at any time.
~SY.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all for your advice and ive decided that hes caused enuogh heartbreak and theres someone else out there for me , thanks again ;)
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A
female
reader, *problems*  +, writes (9 June 2009):
 You abviously love this man! But if it was the other way around would he be so forgiving? Cheating can bring up all sorts off issues!(in your head too ), Trust issues! It can make you paraniod about what hes doing and when but do you really want to be thinking those things?? and for a start if you had not have caught him would he have owned up to you?? The ones who cheat might say they will never do it again, the truth is they should never do it in the 1st place! dont let him walk all over you! think about yourself and how you feel and your needs!! because it seems to me he is only thinking about himself,Stand up for what you really feel and forget his flowers cards and movies, it will take alot more that immaterial things to remove what he done ,, hope your ok xxx
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady  +, writes (9 June 2009):
 If it was once, I'd say he would have to prove himself to you by being a trustworthy boyfriend. But since it's the second time, don't even bother. There's a guy out there who won't cheat on you. Go find him! :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2009): Well it is his second time so...I suggest not getting back with him just now. However I would like more information. Were these kissing/calling someone/having sex cheatings? Both times? Ill be able to reply better once I know this information.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2009): His second time? Honey.. I'm sorry. that's tough.
But the more you go back to him after he does, the more he knows he can get away with it. He's not learning a lesson here and generally, a cheater is a cheater is still a damn cheater.
If you really feel you must be with him, then at least make him earn it. Make him work HARD for it so that you can teach him that it's NOT ok and you won't forgive him every time.
~SY.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2009): "Trust" is a state of mind. "Trust" is not something that can be initiated by action. "Trust" is the result of connections and experiences through time between people.
Whether you 'should' trust him (again) or not is not something you can just choose to do. It is something that is gained over time.
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