A
male
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:I was wondering what other people thought about this. For many years me and my older cousin(female) have been REALLY close. We've slept and cuddled together in the same bed,i often spend the night at her place,we text each other often everyday saying "I love you" etc. that sort of thing. A few times at her place we've cuddled together in front of the fireplace and fell asleep. Is stuff like this normal for first cousins? By the way i do love hern ot only as a cousin but as more than a cousin. I was just wondering what people thought of this,i HAD a gf but ended it with her. Ive never told my cousin how i felt so i was wondering what advice anyone had.
View related questions:
cousin, text Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 May 2008): I'm almost in the same boat as some of you, me and my cousin have fallen head over heels for each other. Obviously since a year ago when we realised we had feelings for one another, things have been very confusing and somewhat stressing at times. But I have a problem, we are a couple in our eyes, but we dont know how to tell our family because we're too afraid they will dis-own us, also how do I tell my friends that the girl I am in love with, is my cousin? What would they think? How would that affect my life and my work?
My cousin and I are still very young, her 20 and me 19 but we are both very wise beyond our years from seeing both our parents marriages fall apart. This also slows us down from wanting to just tell everyone and commit to one another in case we fall out and our whole family relationship would go down the tubes. Often we consider just getting a really big loan and taking off to a foreign country and starting fresh, but what happens if it didn't work out and our parents didn't want to know us after? All of these questions have tortured me for a long time and so far, we have only had each other to speak to about it. I need some sensible advice; my heart tells me to give everything up and stick with her, but my brain tells me to forget about it, she's my cousin after all! Which do I follow??!!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2008): Yeah! nothing is seriously wrong to be in love with any cousin. Geneticists claim that there is an increased risk of birth defects in the offsprings of first cousin. as a human being we are more comlex than other animals. The other animals often mate with their close relatives and believe me I never seen any defects in the offspring of cousin dogs and cats. It just occurs in human according to science, and more so in the culture who considers to have sex with cousin is insane.
Sattar
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2008): seems like your cousin likes you too. You must tell her how you feel :)! It's encouraged. I did the same with my first cousin and we're unseparable now.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm happy that she feels the same! I can't tell you exactly what to do since each case is unique. However do what yall both feel yall want to do whether its getting intimate or not. But don't force anything cause you don't want to ruin the relationship. Me and my cousin are taking things slow because neither of us want to jump ahead and rush things. I have no problem "keeping it in the family" like you, my cousin I love more than any other person. My ex found out about us(that's y she's my ex) but my cousin has always been there. Please keep me updated! I hope I helped some
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 March 2008): dude, im in this exact same situation that you are in. except its my second cousin and i have been thinking about her ever since i was 7 years old! ever since i was 7 i liked her ( scratch that, loved her!) she feels the same about me because she tells me she likes me. i know that if i did anything with her or vis versa our family would look at us... its been dormant for a while ( hits me every 2 years or so) but it we have increasingly become more and more involved ( nothing physical besides talking on the phone). we just stick to talking each other ( for hours! about anything!!) because its the only thing we could do without suspicious people looking at us. no other girl in my life even comes close to what i feel about her. i could see most beautiful females in the world and it couldn't change my mind how i feel about her... its hard to describe this type of love.
note: if she wasn't related... i would have been married her a long time ago...
so my question is what should i do? keep this as it is ( trying my best to keep it like this)?
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHi,in response to the last poster: I did finally tell her:) she was shocked but not in a negative way,nothing has changed. We are taking things slowly but she does let me kiss her on the cheek,near the lips,do cousins usually do that? I love her with all my heart,if people think im sick etc it doesn't matter,I won't stop being involved with my cousin and yes she's still my #1 love:) there's more to say so I hope to hear from yall soon
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 March 2008): I dont know if you ever check this again, but i was wondering how things went with your cousin.
I`ve got a few cousins, but i`ve never really met them, and well recently i met one and i thought she was hot.
And well i get the feeling she thinks the same about me, but i cant be sure, I think she feels the same but she is being more sensible about the situation and after we where out one night the day after she has been cold with me.
So any more advice would be great. And also as i said be good to know what you did etc.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2008): Interesting good luck in many cultures it happens several of my friends are products such first and second cousin marriages nothing genetically wrong with them but hey its not approved in every culture
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2008): man Im in the same shooes you are!!! lately i have spent time with my cousin(female) we have gone to the movies and had fun together...i really like her but im afraid of how she would react to it...i guess we just have to be patient until one day something happens and i just pray she falls in love with me...
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2008): man Im in the same shooes you are!!! lately i have spent time with my cousin(female) we have gone to the movies and had fun together...i really like her but im afraid of how she would react to it...i guess we just have to be patient until one day something happens and i just pray she falls in love with me...
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks so much for the advice,to the anonymous guy,i do tell her shes "hot" or looks really good in what shes wearing etc. so is that a good start,oh and her responses are always like "thank you!" with a smile its nothing like she feels weird etc. what are some other ways i should tell her? to the anon. female,thank you for your advice,youre right we gotta take a chance=)
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2007): hej! I think you should tell her...I love my second cousin(male)and we have been together for 4 months but it's a sicret for now (few of our friends know)...we are scared to tell our parents and other relatives...when i have realized i'm in love with him I was scared and the begining was hard...but now i'm the happiest pearson on earth...it's worth taking chance! belive me...
I wish you good luck with here and i hope you will find the happines like i did...
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2007): Telling anyone for the first time that you love them is a risk, no matter who it is.
Instead of saying "the whole thing" you could just one day tell her that she's looking absolutely beautiful today. Her reaction to that might tell you what you want to know.
Less risk, but less courage shown. And if it's going to turn out well, then being courageous at the start might make ... even unto the rest of your life better.
But this is your life, rather than the life of some anonymous guy on the internet. I offer this as a suggestion of what you might do. But it's your life, and you should live it the way that YOU want to.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice! any advice on how i should tell her?
...............................
A
female
reader, blondie 12  +, writes (17 November 2007):
 tell her if you and her are really close than she will not hold it agains you hey she might think the same way she might be hopeing you'll make the frist move it ligle (i think)your family might not like it but your happy thats all that matters
...............................
|
