A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There is this guy that has liked me since forever. I think like in freshman year and I graduated in 07.. So its been a while. I never really liked him but I kinda do. Its like I'm not physically attracted to him, but am to his personality. Well now we are both single so he asked me out. We did and we where at the movies and started to hold hands. I guess to him that meant a lot more than what it meant to me. So now he thinks we are starting something. And I'm not sure I want to. I'm going to his birthday party on saturday and tomarrow I'm going out with him again. So I don't know what to do. Should I tell him that I really don't like him like that? Or what should I do? He is leaving to the marines pretty soon. So should I just wait till he leaves? Any advice? Please help.. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Susan Strict  +, writes (24 April 2008):
 Absolutely tell him. But don't put it like that - don't say "I don't like you like that". Something more along the lines of "You're really, really great, but I couldn't ever do any physical stuff with you."
Also, keep in mind that holding hands and a big hug is something that close friends of the opposite sex DO, and it's fine. It doesn't have to mean that you are going to jump into bed together. Once you've made sure he knows where he stands, then may I suggest that just before he leaves for the marines a big hug and a kiss on the cheek would go a long way to keeping an important friendship and lettting him know that's exactly as far as it goes. It's what a sister would do, isn't it? And that's what you want to be to him. Just make quite sure he knows that.
A
male
reader, alan949 +, writes (24 April 2008):
Speaking from a guy's point of view... In this situation I would much rather have the girl just tell me that she doesn't feel that way about me so that I know that I could stop chasing her around and hoping that something will eventually happen when it won't. Also from a guy's point of view and the comments already posted, please do be gentle when telling him. It could still have a big impact on him no matter how gently you say it... Also if he is leaving for the marines then he might not be constantly thinking about you all the time and he can have the time to recover more quickly
Well I think that's all I have to say for this, hope it helped =D
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (24 April 2008):
You have two options, the slow or the quick way.
No matter how you sugar coat it, it would be a bitter pill for him to swallow.
You could slowly disengage and withdraw from his world and
he would get your message that you are not interested in a
relationship but only as friends.
The quick way is to have a frank and honest talk with him and tell him your feelings .
You are not ready for a relationship and want to be on the 'friends' level only.
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A
female
reader, Aeval  +, writes (24 April 2008):
 Be honest with him and don't lead him on, If you do that then you may have a chance of being friends! he may however be a tad upset if he thinks you are starting something and he has loved you for so long.
Try to be gentle!!
Good luck
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