A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:every time we have sex I stay unsatisfied. I rather for him to make it quick just to get it over with. There is a time when its good but that's only when I can engage him to make it "rough" but he doesn't like to. What can I do cuz its really killing my feelings for him...I forgot to mention we have 4 yrs together 'straight' and we have a 2 month daughter....and have 2 yrs living together... Reply to this Question
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (22 October 2009):
 That could destroy your family. The guy simply needs to learn how to please you, and he needs to know that it's a very important matter.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionFirst of I thank everyone with the advice and here is my response: my communication with my husband is very good and I have talked to him about what I like and I even ask him during sex to do certain actions. But he says no he isn't into that stuff. He tells me he loves having sex and I know he does but he loves normal sex and I don't. When we have sex its just for his satisfaction. Lately I have talked to a guy friend and he is willing to have a sex only relationship with me but I don't want to harm my family....am I wrong?
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A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (16 October 2009):
While I agree with the communication issues, I suspect that the root of your problem is that your mate does not really know how to please a woman. Actually, few men learn much about it prior to their 30s, and some never learn at all. Consider searching "female orgasm" in the search field, but he is the person who should read about it.
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A
female
reader, LallaZine  +, writes (15 October 2009):
 Communicate about it, you will feel less stressed and frustrated. It's worth a try. Get him aroused, wear something that will drive him wild maybe his animal instincts will come out lol. :-)
If things are getting a bit dry and boring make an effort to spice things up, he should make an effort too - it's a two way thing. Maybe think back to when the sex was good and what you used to do together, I wouldn't worry. Feel frustrated is totally normal, it's wrong to feel that sometimes you want him to just get it over with quickly - he should be treating you like a woman and making you feel sexy, the longer the better. Obviously you dont want to get too serious and start analysing it but maybe make some kind of plan to get what you want, use your woman's intuition. :-) Take care and make sure you talk about it when you get a chance, you may be suprised maybe he is also feeling the same.
x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2009): sometimes the dynamics of sex changes with childbirth. You will have to explore and find what works for you now. Things are looser and just different. Communication is the key here. This may take a little time and effort but sex can be mind blowing again...trust me on this one ;)
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (15 October 2009):
Well if you are married then why can't you talk to him about it?
Communication is the absolute key to being married and happy, so you need to TELL him what you like and the two of you can experiment to see what works.
A good tip is to make sure that you get an orgasm during foreplay, then you are pretty much ready to go for your next one during sex and if not then you won't feel frustrated at the end of it.
Good Luck!! xx
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